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 Open marriages/relationships?

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MandyPerfumeGirl
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PostSubject: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptySun Jun 20, 2010 4:05 pm

What do you think about open marriage or open relationship? Do you think it is immoral because it is not monogamous? Do you have the same moral outrage toward marriages which are sexless?
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptySun Jun 20, 2010 6:49 pm

Never been in one. I could only see being in one if I'm not really feeling the one I'm with. If I'm in love, I can't share.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptySun Jun 20, 2010 7:30 pm

StoneStatic wrote:
What do you think about open marriage or open relationship? Do you think it is immoral because it is not monogamous? Do you have the same moral outrage toward marriages which are sexless?

I think they're impractical and basically a contradiction to the whole point of being in a relationship. If someone isn't ready or interested in being monogamous, they should just recreationally date. For me I couldn't see being in a "open" relationship. That's asking for trouble IMHO.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptySun Jun 20, 2010 8:29 pm

I would prefer a monogamous relationship rather than an open one. If I were put in that situation then I would rather be alone.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyMon Jun 21, 2010 12:18 am

I can't imagine ever being in one. Seems like it would almost have this element of not being in one. Plus things like that become convoluted; start letting third parties into your relationship, how long will it be before the 'rules' of that 'open relationship' become scathed? While having your cake and eating it too, you're also playing with fire.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyMon Jun 21, 2010 12:44 am

I beg to differ.

I have never been in a polygamous relationship, but I know several polygamists.
MORALITY is something thats defined as the principles of what makes something good or bad.
Now, true, in the USA a man cannot take up (legally) more than one wife, and vice versa. Infidelity can be a charged crime in the military, and within the boundaries of several religions, polygamy is bound by death. However, polygamy in many countries, is survival, is custom, and is actually thought to be a norm. I do not believe we as humans can judge the next person as immoral because customs and religion make individuals biased. The world is DIVERSE.

I have a friend, whom was in a polygamous relationship involving 2 females, all three members of this relationship shared a roof, and were in a relationship with each other. this relationship lasted over 10 years. All three Women (gosh the idea of one woman gives me a headache) were beyond happy. All three Women had different personalities and strengths, and the balance in the relationship was intense. The reason for breaking up wasn't infidelity outside of their relationship, or the need to be with one more than the other. The relationship ended because one individual moved, and the balance between the three was broken. According to them, they had perfection in their menage.

once again, polygamy is not for me, but it has caused the survival of many countries, and it can work better than some monogamous relationships. It just depends on how you would like to paint your picture.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyMon Jun 21, 2010 1:38 pm

angelicaddiction wrote:
I beg to differ.

I have never been in a polygamous relationship, but I know several polygamists.
MORALITY is something thats defined as the principles of what makes something good or bad.
Now, true, in the USA a man cannot take up (legally) more than one wife, and vice versa. Infidelity can be a charged crime in the military, and within the boundaries of several religions, polygamy is bound by death. However, polygamy in many countries, is survival, is custom, and is actually thought to be a norm. I do not believe we as humans can judge the next person as immoral because customs and religion make individuals biased. The world is DIVERSE.

I have a friend, whom was in a polygamous relationship involving 2 females, all three members of this relationship shared a roof, and were in a relationship with each other. this relationship lasted over 10 years. All three Women (gosh the idea of one woman gives me a headache) were beyond happy. All three Women had different personalities and strengths, and the balance in the relationship was intense. The reason for breaking up wasn't infidelity outside of their relationship, or the need to be with one more than the other. The relationship ended because one individual moved, and the balance between the three was broken. According to them, they had perfection in their menage.

once again, polygamy is not for me, but it has caused the survival of many countries, and it can work better than some monogamous relationships. It just depends on how you would like to paint your picture.

This was well written. I think that we often judge others but what is right or wrong for US. I honestly do not believe that men where meant to mate with just one woman for life. It simply does not make sense in nature. Within human society we change what we believe is right or wrong, for example not too long ago a young girl of 15 could marry a man and not a second thought was given to her age or his.........now its illegal.

If an open relationship is good for all parties involved, then who are we to speak up in disagreement for something that does not concern us.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyMon Jun 21, 2010 1:55 pm

Personally I do feel that open relationships are immoral. I would never be in one. If other people are fine with having lax monogamy, then more power to them. I suppose. However, do not cry or whine if all of that extended leeway leads to catastrophe. If your man (or woman) decides that he (or she) likes what they tasted on the side just a little bit more than your flavor and winds up dropping you to further pursue it, then you will have no one else to blame but yourself. If a couple, while one or both enjoy a smörgåsbord of lovers and flings, suddenly discovers a weird cough or infection they will have no one else to blame but themselves.

The whole point of a relationship (IMO) is a declaration to having found the one who completes—or satisfies—one enough that they no longer feel compelled to sample what else is out there. It is akin to taking down the help wanted sign after having found the right applicant.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyMon Jun 21, 2010 5:17 pm

I mean, hey, if both parties agree to it, then whatever. I still think open relationships are playing with fire.

Do Open Relationships Work?
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyTue Jun 22, 2010 12:50 pm

Hey, if it works for you....then whatever. It's sort of like a catch 22 to me. I know logically, men aren't meant to be monogamous but it's like....how bad do you love the person you're in a relationship with to remain faithful? It's a constant struggle, but it's definitely mind over matter more than anything. I personally wouldn't do it. I'll get a headache dealing with one person's drama....why the hell would I want to deal with two or more?
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyTue Jun 22, 2010 1:30 pm

It would never be for me, but I don't judge others who have such preference.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyWed Jun 30, 2010 8:03 pm

I don't have any moral outrage over what other people do in their relationships and what works for them. It's really none of my business. I will say though that there is no way I would ever be in an open relationship. If he can't deal with monogamy, then we're not compatible. You can screw around by yourself, don't try and be with me while keeping your options open at the same time. Doesn't work.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyFri Jul 02, 2010 10:13 pm

I would never be part of an open marriage/relationship. To me, open marriages and relationships are a joke. I wouldn't go so far as to say it's immoral, because both of the partners are open about seeing other people and they're open with it towards their partner, but I still think it's a joke. If you're not going to be monogamous and true blue with your partner, particularly in a marriage, then get out.

As for sexless marriages, I'm not outraged by that. I think it's a shame because every marriage needs some sort of sex in it. It's an important part of marriage and I think if it's non-existent then the couple should try to seek some sort of outside help for it.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptySat Jul 03, 2010 7:58 am

Much as I enjoy freaks and orgies when I'm single, in a relationship it should be just about the two.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyThu Sep 16, 2010 4:20 pm

I'm not a serial swinger, but I have been in open relationships before. I've been in totally exclusive monogamous relationships too. I'm pretty "anything goes", so it really just depnds on the chemistry and rapport I have with THAT person/woman. Whatever the vibe dictates sets the tone of the relationship.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyThu Sep 16, 2010 6:55 pm

As long as all parties involved consent and no one gets hurt that's their business and I don't think there's anything immoral. But it's not for me.
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PostSubject: Re: Open marriages/relationships?   Open marriages/relationships? EmptyThu Sep 16, 2010 9:42 pm

"Open" marriages and relationships always end in disaster. There's a reason it's called being a COUPLE. Once a couple starts inviting 3rd parties in, the foundation starts to crack.
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