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I feel like a bit of a jerk about something. I like to think I am a good person, but there is something that makes me so uncomfortable.

The situation is that one of the "big" things my son's dad and I are at odds about at the moment is his new adoration of this one small little tavern. He likes to stop out there. Long story why I despise it...

Anyway, in effort to maybe show some solidarity, I agreed to go over there with him. I dislike him going there for many reasons that do not involve the owner. But the thing is, the owner had some sort of affliction (not sure what, probably cancer?) that has left him with a voice box thing.

I have been there four times and twice the owner has been there. I am entirely uncomfortable with it. I don't feel comfortable around that. He has to push on the thing on his neck (forgive me for not wording that better) to talk.

I feel like I am such a jerk for feeling this way.

So, did you ever have a time you felt uncomfortable due to another's condition?

I think those voice-boxes make lots of people uncomfortable because there are so few of them.

I think my biggest issue is being confronted with a stubborn bipolar person who's obviously off the dose, and it's happened more than a few times. They can get very obnoxious and hard to deal with, then I lose my patience and the war is on.

I can understand the discomfort. I have been working with the mentally and phyisically disabled for so many years that I am pretty much used to most afflictions.

Where I work now there is a blind woman as our receptionist. She is a very nice, intelligent person whom I enjoy talking with. However, her grey blind eyes are discomfitting. She does not go the traditional blind person ploy of wearing dark sunglasses. Ironic that she doesn't see it but others do.

Also, she has this reading app on her computer that sounds just like Stephen Hawking with a Max Headroom stutter now and then. I find that fascinating.

I have a friend who has an artificial eye - which sometimes looks very artificial when the alignment is wrong or his eyelid never closes over it when his eyes are supposed to be closed.

Acclimation is probably what you need to do. Go spend more time in the bar and see the person as a person first and get used to the strange sounding voice box.

Sorta like seeing the movies Elephant Man or Mask. Notice how shocking John Merrick or the kid was at first but within the two hours you hardly notice their physical appearance because you see them as a person first.

Yeah, and like RB, I do feel like a jerk (among other things) for this, but in our town there's this one guy we see around who has no legs, and gets around in a motorized chair. I don't know his story, I have never met him, but I do see him around and when I do, I generally try to avoid bumping into him because you're not always aware of how physically you react to something and I keep thinking about if you stare, or if you look away, either way it can come off as damn disrespectful.

I understand you feeling uncomfortable, but when I am around people with disabilities I thank God for keeping me healthy and my heart goes out to them. Don't beat yourself up about it some people just have higher tolerance than others.

I'm probably uncomfortable around any that are obvious, but I try not to show it.

I think having a special needs child has really made me immune to just about everything. Having been constantly exposed to it on a regular basis, I don't even blink anymore.

» Virginia lawmaker: Children with disabilities are God’s punishment to women who previously had abortions.

Hitskin.com

Are there any disabilities or afflictions you are uncomfortable around?