http://usnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/12/14/9447882-school-on-defensive-after-telling-parents-their-son-is-gay

Quote :

School on defensive after telling parents their son is gay
By Sylvia Wood, msnbc.com

A school district in Utah is defending its decision to “out” a middle-school student as gay to his parents in light of safety and bullying concerns.

“The administrator did exactly the right thing,” said Rhonda Bromley, a spokeswoman for the Alpine School District in Lehi, Utah. “We are not going to back down. We take bullying very, very seriously.”

The Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network urged caution in these situations.

“Schools should not out LGBT students without their consent,” said GLSEN Executive Director Eliza Byard. “Outing a student not only violates their right to privacy, but also could compromise their safety. Parents can be notified of their child being bullied at school, but without disclosing their sexual orientation or gender identity.”

The situation started last week when the 14-year-old’s class at Willowcreek Middle School was assigned to create an advertisement about themselves to hang on the classroom wall. The boy wrote about being gay, Bromley said.

When the teacher approached him about whether he wanted to share that information publicly, the boy said he did. The teacher decided to involve the assistant school principal, who spoke with the boy and counseled him on talking with his parents.

The student was hesitant to approach his parents, but agreed “reluctantly” to let the administrator to speak with them, Bromley said. At the boy’s request, he was not present when his parents were told.

“The student chose himself to make his sexuality known in a variety of ways,” Bromley said. “And there had already started to be some negative feedback.”

“If there is the potential for a bullying or a harassment situation, it’s the responsibility of the school to step in and to make sure the student is safe,” she said.

School districts across the country are struggling with anti-gay bullying in light of highly publicized cases involving teen suicides. In October 2010, the suicide death of two teen boys prompted U.S. Secretary of Education Arne Duncan to issue a call for action.

Their deaths followed at least three other suicides that year linked to “the trauma of being bullied and harassed for their actual or perceived sexual orientation was too much to bear,” Duncan said at the time.

“This is a moment where every one of us -- parents, teachers, students, elected officials, and all people of conscience -- needs to stand up and speak out against intolerance in all its forms,” he said.

Byard said it’s important for schools to deal with bullying and notify parents of any instances, without disclosing a student’s sexual orientation or gender identity.

"Taking away the choice for a LGBT student to come out on their own terms opens the door to significant risks, including harassment at school and family rejection," she said.

Andy Thayer, co-founder of the Gay Liberation Network, said family rejection is a real risk, and some young gay teens have found themselves homeless as a result.

The school "could very well have worsened that situation considerably," he said.

Bromley said the case at Alpine School District has drawn national attention, in part, because the student’s friends created a Facebook page, which has since turned into a an invitation-only group. The original page, which received more than 400 “likes,” asked students and supporters to write the assistant principal in defense of the student.

Bromley said some of the information on the original page was inaccurate, including the claim that the district suspended the boy. She said his parents chose to keep him home this week.

“We’ve received many phone calls and emails from many people based on inaccurate information,” she said. She said the boy was never in trouble and the goal of the district was to keep him safe.

“The last thing we want is for students to think there would be some sort of consequence for this,” she said.

I agree with the school. Even though the boy "reluctantly" agreed, he did agree. He put the info out for the school to see, so it is illogical to think his parents wouldn't learn of it.

RedBedroom wrote:

I agree with the school. Even though the boy "reluctantly" agreed, he did agree. He put the info out for the school to see, so it is illogical to think his parents wouldn't learn of it.

14-year-old boys are sometimes quite candid, revealing private info that they really want to get out there. He may have been wanting to come out for a long time and saw this as an opportunity. I just hope his parents don't go off and are able to support him (Utah is one of those scary places to be a gay kid).

The school didn't do anything unethical. The boy created the situation and they spoke to him before doing anything more.

My opinion, is the school helped him "come out" to his parents, school was supportive and gave him that extra "boost" he was needing. I see nothing wrong with what the school did.

The parents already knew he was gay. They're just mad that everybody else knows too.

Normally I'm 100% against outing & believe it has to be the persons choice but it looks like the school was doing its job for a change & I don't know if "outing" is the right word here...that is if I'm reading this right.

Quote :

“The student chose himself to make his sexuality known in a variety of ways,” Bromley said. “And there had already started to be some negative feedback.”

“If there is the potential for a bullying or a harassment situation, it’s the responsibility of the school to step in and to make sure the student is safe,” she said.

This looks to me like someone who is trying to protect this kid. It doesn't look like he was upset about the parents being told. Only that he didn't want to be present, which they honored. If I'm understanding this situation they were looking out for him which is a refreshing change from so many of the stories we've heard.

The situation started last week when the 14-year-old’s class at Willowcreek Middle School was assigned to create an advertisement about themselves to hang on the classroom wall. The boy wrote about being gay, Bromley said.

When the teacher approached him about whether he wanted to share that information publicly, the boy said he did. The teacher decided to involve the assistant school principal, who spoke with the boy and counseled him on talking with his parents.

The student was hesitant to approach his parents, but agreed “reluctantly” to let the administrator to speak with them, Bromley said. At the boy’s request, he was not present when his parents were told.

“The student chose himself to make his sexuality known in a variety of ways,” Bromley said. “And there had already started to be some negative feedback.”


I don't understand what the GLSEN is complaining about then. It sounds like the kid outed himself. The school did NOTHING wrong and for once acted appropriately to protect a student. The GLSEN should be THANKING the school not admonishing them.

Not only did they protect him, but by informing the parents with his permission then allows the boy to receive psychological treatment. As Shale said, Utah is one heck of a place for a gay teenager. If he is struggling, or has questions, or needs advice, this way he can get therapy to now that his feelings are normal.

I agree that the school acted very responsibly in this scenario; making the child's well-being paramount and handling every step the way they were supposed to.