Absence DOES make the heart grow fonder...

Caution: This is an "all about me" thread.

My guy and I have a rough year. Long story but we are working on "us" this year and will decide in June if we should stay together. (the time the lease is due)

He's been working out of town this week, and I truly miss him. I am feeling giddy that I feel this way. He's normally not out of town for more than a day or two and now that he may not be home until next week, I am certainly missing him a lot. I adore that I am feeling this way because most of last summer, I would have paid cash for this many days apart.

We still have work to do, but to remain together happily unmarried to my son's dad means the world to me. He is a great guy, but we have issues and I am thinking our work is paying off or I would not miss him as I am now.

Shale wrote:Wishing you well in working thru those issues. Are you getting counseling input. Sometimes a third party is needed. And, sometimes even they can't grasp the nuanced problems that are an issue with the couple but apparently insignificant to others outside the relationship.

We really would benefit from a third party, for sure. The thing is, he works..ALL THE TIME. So, keeping an appointment would be an issue. Winter slows his schedule down, so I am hoping he will dedicate time to us talking to someone. We have been on again/off again for 14 years, and lived apart twice during that time. It is time to shit or get off the pot, to be blunt.

I always thought we would prosper from him working out of town more than a day or two. I am optimistic that I miss him. I have not missed him in 14 years, spending a majority of that the exact opposite of missing him.

Good luck Red, I really hope it works out for you. It's good that you miss him but IMHO it's more important you're glad he's home than sad he's away. How does he feel? Is he happy with the way things have been for the past 14 years? How long do you expect the relationship to last? Can you see yourself being happy growing old together or do you think it's over once your son is out of the house? Why do you seem to catch all the red lights when you're in a hurry but if you need to stop to look for something that fell on the floor, all the lights are green I'm a romantic at heart so I hope you stay together but only if it makes you happy.

Red, good luck, the fact that you miss him is a very good sign. I hope he misses you just as much.

A week in the great scheme of life isn't much. My dear old grandmother used to say "absence makes the heart grow fonder, fonder of the other fellow". She was talking about real absences not a week long absence.

Alan Smithee wrote:Good luck Red, I really hope it works out for you. It's good that you miss him but IMHO it's more important you're glad he's home than sad he's away. How does he feel? Is he happy with the way things have been for the past 14 years? How long do you expect the relationship to last? Can you see yourself being happy growing old together or do you think it's over once your son is out of the house? Why do you seem to catch all the red lights when you're in a hurry but if you need to stop to look for something that fell on the floor, all the lights are green I'm a romantic at heart so I hope you stay together but only if it makes you happy.

@Tony, no, he didn't miss me as much. Oh well. @Suzi, Yah it takes longer than this to define absence, for sure!

@ Alan, that's a lot of questions! But, he did not miss me a bunch, and that is fine. But he did end up coming home from nine at night Saturday and leave Sunday at seven. He forgot the first SX race of the year was live, so that's a good sign! I suspect we may not be together after our boy gets older, but I don't know...As much as I look forward to being grandmother to my step-daughter's kids, I know he will screw it up. He puts work first ALWAYS.