Question for parents of adults....

....are you sad when your kids have birthdays?

My stepdaughter turned 23 today. I am so sad about her adult status. She is going to need me less and less as the years go by.

I am taken by the fact on my 23rd b-day, I was mom to her newborn brother. She has already gotten farther than I ever did at that age and I am so proud.

I guess I am more emotional about it as I know she is applying for teaching jobs out of state next year and I NEVER thought she would leave the area.

So....I am so emotional tonight thinking about her spreading her wings.

I don't have any kids, but I've never thought of it that way.
I know when I moved out of home my dad was devastated. THe only sane child is leaving me!
But, I speak regularly to them, skype and so on... its like I never left.

Its an exciting time for your daughter... interstate isn't too bad

My brother and I were the runts of the litter and are also the only ones who have stayed home instead of running off the minute we turned 18 like my older sisters. Now it may sound like they made the smarter, more 'adult' choice, but given their reasons and the way they went about doing it, I think my brother and I made the better decision. I don't know about my brother, but I plan to get out of here someday, but the difference is when I go, I'm taking my mother with me, I'm the thing that's been keeping her young for over 20 years.

Super, you make me totally relate...I plan to be her house-guest three times a year, so in essence she will be taking me with her!

And how long are those 3 times going to be?

RedBedroom wrote:....are you sad when your kids have birthdays?

My stepdaughter turned 23 today. I am so sad about her adult status. She is going to need me less and less as the years go by.

I am taken by the fact on my 23rd b-day, I was mom to her newborn brother. She has already gotten farther than I ever did at that age and I am so proud.

I guess I am more emotional about it as I know she is applying for teaching jobs out of state next year and I NEVER thought she would leave the area.

So....I am so emotional tonight thinking about her spreading her wings.

I don't have any kids, but my nephews are 25, 23, 21. The eldest's wife just had a baby making me a great-aunt at 37!!! Now I feel old. I was crying so hard when his daughter was born, and asked him "Am I supposed to let you go now?" He replied, "Never, I'll be mad if you do".... Sometimes I hurt so bad when I see what i think are wrong choices in his life---- he got married too young. Could have traveled and experienced life--- but HE chose to live as he wishes.. and I need to respect that. He has a terrible wife... but she is HIS wife not mine. He is in the coast guard and could not wait to move away--- that last about a year until he got transferred back here because he couldnt stay away from his family!

Let the kids grow up... and guess what... you might find out that they need you more! Where do you think they went when the baby was born? They stayed 2 weeks with my sister for "baby help"! LOL Kids will always need their parents... their needs just change tho... they will need you in different ways than they did before.. but you will ALWAYS be a parent!

My daughter will be 24 on her next birthday. I don't feel sad because she won't need us but we are closer to having an empty nest than not and that will take some getting used to.

My youngest will be 51 years old on the 13th of this month. I don't know how the baby got so old.

Suzi wrote:My youngest will be 51 years old on the 13th of this month. I don't know how the baby got so old.

Has your baby become a member of AARP yet? I know there was a delight of annoying my mother when I let her know I had joined. She was only 65 at the time.

We don't have AARP here, we actually have CARP, but they are useless so we don't bother with it.

Suzi wrote:We don't have AARP here, we actually have CARP, but they are useless so we don't bother with it.

So that would be more like CRAP.

Supernova wrote:And how long are those 3 times going to be?

LOL, just long weekends, as I still have to work and earn money!!

wants2laugh wrote:

I don't have any kids, but my nephews are 25, 23, 21. The eldest's wife just had a baby making me a great-aunt at 37!!! Now I feel old. I was crying so hard when his daughter was born, and asked him "Am I supposed to let you go now?" He replied, "Never, I'll be mad if you do".... Sometimes I hurt so bad when I see what i think are wrong choices in his life---- he got married too young. Could have traveled and experienced life--- but HE chose to live as he wishes.. and I need to respect that. He has a terrible wife... but she is HIS wife not mine. He is in the coast guard and could not wait to move away--- that last about a year until he got transferred back here because he couldnt stay away from his family!

Let the kids grow up... and guess what... you might find out that they need you more! Where do you think they went when the baby was born? They stayed 2 weeks with my sister for "baby help"! LOL Kids will always need their parents... their needs just change tho... they will need you in different ways than they did before.. but you will ALWAYS be a parent!

You seem like a totally kick ass auntie!!

Thanks... they always did call me "Da Cool Aunt"....

that is why i dont regret not having kids... cause i lived all the little league, coached hockey, went to karate tournaments, bowling leagues, etc etc. I got to do all the fun stuff and rarely had to be the "bad guy"! that is the Best part of "parenting"! LOL

wants2laugh wrote:Thanks... they always did call me "Da Cool Aunt"....

that is why i dont regret not having kids... cause i lived all the little league, coached hockey, went to karate tournaments, bowling leagues, etc etc. I got to do all the fun stuff and rarely had to be the "bad guy"! that is the Best part of "parenting"! LOL

I don't like when adults get a bad rap for not wanting to be parents. There are soooo many ways to be influential in kids' lives. I had two AMAZING Aunties and that made me want to be auntie more than Mom, to a point. As an only child I had to become "Auntie" to my God Daugher and my high school best friend's daughther, but I am still "Auntie Redbedroom" to them. And I love it.

That is awesome... i have several neighborhood kids that were friends with my nephews that still call me aunt---its funny to hear them say that at 28 years old, and they have their kids call me aunt too. One of them was just on the cover of a magazine called Ink & Hip Hop! She looks awesome!

Wow! Total hottie! Great cover!

just wish all those tattoos weren't real---- but whatcha gonna do? LOL her body, her money... when she is like 90 and they all turn colors and sag she is going to be thinking "what the hell"??? LOL

Well, she is smarter than most. That ink is easily covered.