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Supernova
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RedBedroom
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    Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer....

    RedBedroom
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    • Post n°1

    Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer.... Empty Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer....

    Post by RedBedroom Sat Oct 06, 2012 12:53 am

    Man, I tell ya...

    In my 20's I was an expert at telling people what they wanna hear. Then I realized, honesty is the best policy always.

    So, today a friend asks me if it is tacky to ask her kid's friends to bring food to a sleep over. Is it tacky? I don't know for sure...do I think it's tacky? Heck yes. So, I told her it was and gave her some good cheapie ideas. She's pissed now.

    ** FYI, this isn't about the financially struggling friend I posted about but this friend was doing it to do a slumber party on the cheap.
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    • Post n°2

    Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer.... Empty Re: Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer....

    Post by wants2laugh Sat Oct 06, 2012 12:56 am

    omg... that is sooo wrong that she wanted them to bring food.

    When I was a kid, I was invited to a party that asked the kids to bring a topping for ice cream. Everyone brought something different, so we had like 20 different toppings and it was fun. but never was asked, nor would ask, someone to bring food. just weird. Adult pot lucks are different
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    RedBedroom
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    • Post n°3

    Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer.... Empty Re: Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer....

    Post by RedBedroom Sat Oct 06, 2012 1:53 am

    The ice cream topping idea is a great one...I would send it to her, but I am now pissed that she is pissed....I'm such a catty girl.

    But really, don't ask a friend a question if you want a particular reply.
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    • Post n°4

    Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer.... Empty Re: Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer....

    Post by Supernova Sat Oct 06, 2012 2:03 am

    Well that's what I've always told my mother. Don't ask someone 'does this make me look fat?' unless you're ready to hear 'yes it does'.
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    • Post n°5

    Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer.... Empty Re: Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer....

    Post by RedBedroom Sat Oct 06, 2012 2:50 am

    See, I have always categorized the "do I look fine?" question in that category of "they are seeking a positive reply." But, I am honest with that too. My neighbor had me judge dresses for a party and one of them left me asking her if she was attending the party or working it.
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    • Post n°6

    Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer.... Empty Re: Don't ask a question if you don't want an honest answer....

    Post by Shale Sat Oct 06, 2012 9:14 am

    Supernova wrote:Well that's what I've always told my mother. Don't ask someone 'does this make me look fat?' unless you're ready to hear 'yes it does'.
    I just hope I am man enuf to be totally honest.

    "Clothes don't make you look fat - Your fat makes you look fat!"

    "If I were your age with wrinkled skin and actually had jet black hair, I would go get some grey put in it."

    "Parting your hair just above one ear and combing it over doesn't hide the fact that you are bald on top."

    "Many old guys lose their hair, why do you insist on wearing that fony looking hairpiece. Just get a baseball cap."
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    • Post n°7

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    Post by Suzi Sat Oct 06, 2012 12:46 pm

    Funny as I have aged I am less willing to hurt someones feelings with the truth. As for is asking children to bring food to a slumber party I would have suggested that it it is not customary. I wouldn't have said it was tacky.

    My grandmother had a stock answer for my question of "do I look OK?" she would say "You have to wear it". As a result I grew up thinking I was a real bow wow! Later I was told she did it because she didn't want me to be conceited, well I wasn't. So I would never tell the truth if a dress made someone look fat!
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    • Post n°8

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    Post by Minerva Mon Oct 08, 2012 8:44 pm

    I answer honestly so most people who know me don't ask if they don't want to know my opinion. But those who don't know I will tell them what I really think will sometimes say, "Wow, you are really honest!"

    I'll answer "Well, you aksed, didn't you want me to be?"

    That kind of puzzles me because really if they ask why wouldn't they want an honest answer? I don't do validations.
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    • Post n°9

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    Post by Tony Marino Tue Oct 09, 2012 11:57 am

    RedBedroom wrote:Man, I tell ya...

    In my 20's I was an expert at telling people what they wanna hear. Then I realized, honesty is the best policy always.

    So, today a friend asks me if it is tacky to ask her kid's friends to bring food to a sleep over. Is it tacky? I don't know for sure...do I think it's tacky? Heck yes. So, I told her it was and gave her some good cheapie ideas. She's pissed now.

    ** FYI, this isn't about the financially struggling friend I posted about but this friend was doing it to do a slumber party on the cheap.


    I agree with you Red it is wrong for her to ask the friends to bring food. She is hosting the sleep over therefor she should be responsible for the food! If she didn't want the responsibility then she should have never had the sleep over.
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