Forgive me if I have posted about this before...I don't think I have but it has been on my mind for a very long time.

Anyway, my stepdaughter and I are very close. Unfortunately, she and Jay are not so much anymore. (long story)

So I think when she gets married, she is going to want her first dance with her step dad. Which is fine, it's her day, he is going to walk her down to the alter too.

I do worry about how she will include Jay and I don't like the way she says it will be, which is me in the front row, but Jay not. She says I will be every part of it, but he will not be.

She is very close to being engaged. I know her bf is about to pop the question. They have been together, off and on, for a decade and are only in their mid-20's.

I am just so worried about it all. I think/hope she will soften on him being in the back row and just have something like me do a reading from me and Jay. Do you think that would be a good suggestion? Or should I just let it go and let her totally dictate it?

I know I am thinking about something in the future, but I have been worrying about this forever and just want it to work out so even Jay is happy. But really, he doesn't maybe deserve props at the wedding, and his inclusion is only for me. So maybe I am best to just stay mum.

I don't recall you ever mentioning this before. Sometimes I can recall small details that people reveal about themselves here and sometimes I forget. For example, I know that Shale was almost killed in an avalanche with a morbidly obese woman's stomach. And Chris used to be "Christine". Wait...I may be confused about that one. Anyway, the point is, I think this is the first time I'm learning that their relationship has soured. As the father of a daughter, I think that's sad but it's grand that you and your step daughter are close (that part you have mentioned.) So I guess the question is, how does Jay feel about the situation? If he's truly not bothered about not being included, I would just leave it alone. If he is upset maybe you can make your suggestion about how to include him a little bit more. Put don't push it. My 2¢.

Alan Smithee wrote:

...For example, I know that Shale was almost killed in an avalanche with a morbidly obese woman's stomach. ...

OH, did I mention that here?

Anyhow, I would talk to Jay about it and see how important it is for him to even attend the wedding. May be better to be absent than be ostracized.

Weddings are why I am a proponent of elopement.