That has to be such a hard discussion to have. But I am going to have to ask my dad about it one of these days. I really don't know what he has, if anything. When Mom died, I think she had little or no coverage. So, it was pretty expensive for Dad.

When Dad dies, he expects me to keep the house in the family for a vacation home, and I am thinking about that more and more because it is going to be quite an expense and I don't know what I will do if I have to take over the house expenses as well as his burial.

So, just wondering if any of you have had this discussion with the parents.

No. I think the closest conversation I ever had was when my mom paid off the house when I was about 17 and she told me if something ever happen to her and my stepdad that me and my sibs would be able to continue living there.

Since my Mama passed on my Dad has had no kind of insurance at all. He is arrogant about it and expects the family to pay his funeral expenses and other expenses. Since he is very old now I have control over his finances and for the past 5 years I set up a special bank account and have been putting aside 100.00 a month to help cover his funeral expenses. By the time he goes I will have enough to cover all of it hopefully. My father is a very selfish man and thinks of no one but himself.

Tony, thanks for your honest reply. I am glad that you have had the ability to set money aside for that. It is arrogance and/or vanity that keeps my dad from being upfront about anything having to do with his death. When Mom was alive, my dad never thought to talk to me about what I would do if he died first. Mom was unable to live alone for many years prior to her death. It was just like he knew he wasn't going to die first and never made a plan for it. That is why I don't think he has life insurance, or if he does, it is in conjunction with his pension, and probably not that much.

It is hard to talk to parents about matters like this.

Yep yep, I've talked about insurance with both of my parents so I'd know what to do. I know what kind of insurance they have, who they have it with, how much it is and me and brother are beneficiaries on their policies. I know what my mom and dad wants me to do if something happens.....where they wanna be buried, how they wanna be buried, etc. When I was younger, I was a little leery about getting into that as well because you know....hey, I don't wanna think about them dying. But it's a conversation that I think needs to be had. Same with me. My folks know the provisions I have in place in case something happens to me. There aren't going to be any misunderstandings going on. Talk about it, get it out of the way and live your life.

Good for you that you all have that ironed out. You bring up an excellent point of knowing what their wishes are too. I literally found out Mom's wish to be cremated the day after she died. And because I had always assumed regular burial, it was a heavy thing to process in an already difficult time.

RedBedroom wrote:

Tony, thanks for your honest reply. I am glad that you have had the ability to set money aside for that. It is arrogance and/or vanity that keeps my dad from being upfront about anything having to do with his death. When Mom was alive, my dad never thought to talk to me about what I would do if he died first. Mom was unable to live alone for many years prior to her death. It was just like he knew he wasn't going to die first and never made a plan for it. That is why I don't think he has life insurance, or if he does, it is in conjunction with his pension, and probably not that much.

It is hard to talk to parents about matters like this.

Yeah well my Dad just thinks he has it coming to him because he thinks he was the sterling father. He never talked about any kind of insurance other than his car insurance. When I realized that this expense was going to fall on the family I thought to take action to help out when it does happen. He has no idea I do this so in the end, the joke will be on him.

To this day I have never discussed any kind of life insurance issue with my folks. Their both in their mid-late sixties now, so I imagine the conversation will come up in the next ten years, but it hasn't yet.

i sorta had a convo with my ma, she just mentioned some of it with me, i know she does have money set aside (she been wit her company for over 22 years so she has life ins through them i believe) she mentioned her grandkids get a good chunk. but we've never really discussed more than that. she turns 52 this year, so we have quite a few years to talk still.

scary, i didnt like it when she brought it up.

My family has always talked about Life Insurance. Especially since my father owns and operates a HUGE beef cattle farm. It's know where the property lies with each child and what their responsibilites. Also, we are aware of the fact that we can sell our share of the business to my brother that operates with my father. My parents have always had life insurance policies on all us 4 children too. Then when we were 18, we took over the monthly payments of the insurance. As for my children, as soon as they were born we put policies on them. In the military my husband and I both have life insurance policies. I know people don't like to talk about anything pertaining to death, but it's invitable (sp) and it's better to be ready then hit upside the head when someone passes away.