When Parents Cant Buy Xmas Presents (Your Opinions please!)

If you were laid off, or been laid off for a while and couldn't afford Christmas gifts for your kids, would you communicate that times are hard, borrow from family, ask for charity from friends/family or a spouse, go to the pawn shop, or do one of those quickie loans with the brutal interest?

I'm asking because I am talking to someone who is telling me about her neighbor who has been unemployed for 5 months and only gets enough unemployment for rent, utilities, car insurance and food. She owns her car and is considering doing a "title loan" because she says no matter how bad the economy is, she isn't robbing her kids of a Christmas. Am I missing something? Btw, she has a 9 year old daughter and 12 year old son.

Opinions/judgments/criticisms please.

I think that if times are hard, then it is a family issue and that Christmas needs to be low key. I think it is ridiculous to go to a title loan place or anything like that.

Besides a person can go to the dollar store and pick up a few little things for kids of any age. Or even buy used at a resale shop for a thing or two. And if things are so tight that even those options are not affordable, then that year needs to be a learning year for the kids, which is valuable to kids no matter the age. Everyone gets so into the gifts that the meaning is lost on too many youths. And adults.

I understand the desire to want to shower your kids with gifts but would never put something so important like my transportation in danger. Period. I know this is going to sound so clichéd, but Christmas has become a time of too much expectation for some people. The kids may have to learn a life lesson that there are things more important than the newest toys & gadgets & keeping up with friends. It won't be easy but neither is life & they have to learn that at some point.

There are things that can be bought at a dollar store, Game Stop sells used games if they're into that or outlets that will allow them to at least get something. It would be better to cut back a little in other areas if possible to scrape a few bucks together. You can trim a grocery bill by cutting back on snacks & using store brands for a few weeks. But she is in serious danger of losing her car-something she is going to need when she finds a job. Necessities have priority over gifts that will be forgotten pretty quick anyway. The woman doesn't have a job & the kids need to learn the pecking order of life. She should talk to them & explain their situation. They may even be fine with it.

The last thing someone who is unemployed needs is another bill.

^^^ Totally co-sign. If that were me, my kids will just have to tough it out. I'll do my best and that's all they better expect.

I can't help but think that kids 9 and 12 are old enough to be hear a little bit of truth about tough situations and understand it. If it were me in that spot I would try to scrap together enough cash to buy them something for Christmas but ATST I would let them know that this year might not be a holly jolly one for presents.

It breaks my heart when I think that a kid 9 or 12 would get nothing for Christmas. In my family if someone was that down and out you the family would chip in and give that person money to buy the kids gifts, thats the way it should be unless they have no family. If they have no family then they could tell the kids that Christmas will be a little late in coming this year.

CeCe wrote:I understand the desire to want to shower your kids with gifts but would never put something so important like my transportation in danger. Period. I know this is going to sound so clichéd, but Christmas has become a time of too much expectation for some people. The kids may have to learn a life lesson that there are things more important than the newest toys & gadgets & keeping up with friends. It won't be easy but neither is life & they have to learn that at some point...

ITA with this! Christmas is not about getting big and fancy gifts. I understand where she is coming form, but she's planning on risking her car and that's not a smart idea. Who knows how long she's going to be unemployed. Where I live, there are organizations that help parents/caregivers provide Christmas gifts for their children without the parents risking things like loosing their car. Her kids are old enough to understand that things will be tough this year and that they shouldn't expect glamorous, expensive gifts. She should sit them down and explain to them that they will still have Christmas, but that it won't be like other years.

I sponsor kids in other countries and have a little girl in Haiti, right in Port-au-Prince. I can't imagine what HER Christmas will be like, as she is living in a tent because her home was destroyed in the earthquake. I pray that it has withstood the storms and floods. She wrote in one letter and thanked me for the food I sent, as her family really needed it.

I agree with you all. It's unfortunate that this woman's kids might be without presents this year but she should use this situation to focus on instilling to them what's really important. Like their roof and the food on the table. Let them know that things will eventually get better but sometimes times are tough and this is one of them. There's no way in hell I would put my car in jeopardy to buy Xmas presents when the car is the link to getting from home to work when she finally finds a job.

Is it too late for someone to contact an organization like the Salvation Army on her behalf? They are very helpful with people who have kids & are out of work or otherwise in need this time of year.