Snooki's novel, "A Shore Thing." In stores now

If Hemingway was locked in a tanning bed for 48 hours and then forced to write a novel on the back of a stained cocktail napkin from Karma while inhaling fumes from the house smoosh bed, it would read a lot like the excerpts from Snooki's soon-to-be Pulitzer Prize winning work of fiction: A SHORE THING. The New York Post has the excerpts and it's everything we could've hoped for AND MORE:

• "He had an okay body. Not fat at all. And naturally toned abs. She could pour a shot of tequila down his belly and slurp it out of his navel without getting splashed in the face."
  
• "Yum. Johnny Hulk tasted like fresh gorilla."
  
• "Any juicehead will get some nut shrinkage. And bacne. They fly into a 'roid rage, it is a 'road' 'roid rage."
  
• "I love food. I love drinking, boys, dancing until my feet swell. I love my family, my friends, my job, my boss. And I love my body, especially the badonk."
  
• "Gia danced around a little, shaking her peaches for show. She shook it hard. Too hard. In the middle of a shimmy, her stomach cramped. A fart slipped out. A loud one. And stinky."
  

I'm pretty sure I've written that last one word for word on this blog before. Now I know what honor feels like. And I'm not going to pretend like I won't be reading Snooki's own "On the Road" this summer when I'm baking my nips on the roof of the Holiday Inn. Don't worry, I'll cover it with the jacket from a more respected novel. Like something by Jackie Collins. Or maybe I'll just wait for the movie version directed by Almodóvar and starring Penelope Cruz.

Next Up On Oprah's Book Club... | Dlisted

Further proof that any boob can write a book, so I should have no trouble when I get my novel finished.

No ghost writer here I'll be glad when this fascination has run its course.

CeCe wrote:No ghost writer here I'll be glad when this fascination has run its course.

Nope. Pretty safe to say that those were her own words.

I hear the Jersey Shore is going to Italy!! No Joke!

http://popwatch.ew.com/2011/01/25/jersey-shore-italy-season-4/

I won't be rushing out for this "gem"!!

Her literary style is reminiscent of the father of gonzo journalism, Dr. Hunter S. Thompson.





























NOT!


A room full of chimpanzees pounding away on keyboards would produce something better.

This is one reason why I hate "reality" TV. It makes "stars" out of people like this.

What is Jersey Shore? I mean, I know it's a t.v. show, but what the hell is it supposed to be about?

Nystyle709 wrote:What is Jersey Shore? I mean, I know it's a t.v. show, but what the hell is it supposed to be about?

Jersey Shore is a reality television series on MTV that follows eight housemates spending their summers together, in the first season at the Jersey Shore, the second at Miami Beach, followed by a return to the Jersey Shore for season three, while season four will see them heading to Italy. The first season was filmed in August 2009 in a summer share in Seaside Heights but was also filmed in other towns such as Toms River, Neptune, and Atlantic City, New Jersey. The show debuted amid large amounts of controversy regarding the use of the words "Guido/Guidette," portrayals of Italian-American stereotypes, and scrutiny from locals because the cast members were not residents of the area.

Most of the cast aren't from New Jersey.

I'd never waste my money on a book like this, not even if I was a billionaire. The girl has obviously no talent for writing and what's sick is that they're publishing it because she's famous, not because she's talented. It's all for the sake of a lousy dollar.

But I do have to agree with Chris - it's more than what we had hoped for!