Kids and chores

I will NEVER understand parents who think their kids don't need to ever do any housework or learn to do anything for themselves because they're special or something...or what IS their justification for raising such lazy and useless kids? If nothing else, let's assume Junior doesn't get a high paying job so he can afford to hire a cleaning woman, what's he going to do after having spent his life not having to do dishes or laundry or anything? If nothing else I think you should know how to do that stuff, on the off chance you'd have to do it for a living...I know one person who once said where they work, it's a diner/restaurant something like that, they hired a teenager for the dishwasher job, and he used no soap, no scrubber, and used cold water, WHAT THE HELL?

I think kids should be taught chores, but a little at a time. Maybe when they're a young child have them help out with one or two chores around the and then when they're older, have them take on more responsibility. Kids can eventually be taught all the chores they need to know without burdening their childhood with them. Children need time to go out and play and be a kid and just have fun. Responsibility is for adulthood. And I certainly wouldn't call a child who doesn't do chores as "lazy and useless." It's not lazy or useless to go to school, as most kids do. Until I was about 12 or 13, I didn't have any chores, but someway or another I learned them and can keep a clean house and clean clothes. Think about it before you slap a label on someone.

The problem is I've known people who carried the same attitude and their kids NEVER learned anything and grew up having everyone else doing their work for them because that's what they were always taught. One neighbor I had, his mother's whole attitude was he didn't need to do chores, and he didn't need to sit down and study, never had to do anything boring or hard, he needed to spend all of his time playing, and that attitude never changed, and he grew up and could not get a job ANYWHERE in town because 1. everybody knew him, 2. everybody knew he was a goof off, 3. he couldn't be trusted and 4. he was never going to apply himself to hard work, he wanted stuff that was all easy. After about a year of not getting a job anywhere he finally found one washing dishes at a fast food place but nobody we know is going to eat there because of the odds that he's not doing that properly either.

We were taught you work AND play, and generally, work has to come first, which makes sense because you get that burden off your shoulders, then you have all the time to do what you want; which can also applied to school because you go in the morning, do it first, and then in the afternoon you get out and can play. I never thought of that before but it does make you wonder what would it be like if kids were given the whole day to play and then went to school in the afternoon and night until it was time to go to bed? I don't think it would go over so well because by then they'd be tired and have even less interest in it than they already would, but I digress.

Chores help kids feel like part of the family and they teach them some responsibility and accountability.

My 7 & 9 year olds go to school from 8:30-3:30 MWF and from 8:30-5:10 T and Th, my daughter has Girl Scouts Tuesday night and my son has Lego club the same night. Tuesdays they get home and go straight to bed,but every other day of the week they have responsibilities that they know they need to get done. Usually they have the option of doing a job like washing the windows or cleaning the floors OR watching the twins for me so that *I* can do those jobs. Normally they choose the job!

I also teach them how to cook things that they like to eat, like oatmeal, mac n cheese, pizza, sandwiches...And as they get older I'll teach them how to do laundry and wash dishes (actually they know how to wash dishes but they are too slow and make too big of a mess so it's not worth it to me yet).

They are so proud of themselves when they do something by themselves, like bake brownies or make breakfast for the family.

Also, I saw on Celebrity Rehab that this guy who was super rich had really low self esteem and felt like a POS loser, because he really couldn't do ANYTHING. He'd always had servants do everything, so as an adult he didn't know how to do laundry or cook! I don't my kids feeling that way!

Indeeeed, I mean if you think about it, it's all preparing them for when they grow up, because worst case scenario, what if something happens to you, and suddenly they don't have anybody TO teach them everything LATER on when they're older instead of starting them younger? My mother was baby-sitting by the time she was 5 years old and she learned to do everything young, cooking, cleaning, putting up preserves, gardening, etc., and it has helped her a LOT during her life because in later years she didn't have anybody who would be able to teach it to her THEN.

Supernova wrote:Indeeeed, I mean if you think about it, it's all preparing them for when they grow up, because worst case scenario, what if something happens to you, and suddenly they don't have anybody TO teach them everything LATER on when they're older instead of starting them younger? My mother was baby-sitting by the time she was 5 years old and she learned to do everything young, cooking, cleaning, putting up preserves, gardening, etc., and it has helped her a LOT during her life because in later years she didn't have anybody who would be able to teach it to her THEN.

Now I think I need to start teaching them even more! I never really looked at it that way. I hope my kids always have me to help them but I don't want them to NEED my help either. (as adults)

Shale wrote:In another thread I seemed to be the only one here who did not have a job as a teen.

But, I had household chores, like cleaning off the table after supper and washing the dishes with my sister. In summer I cut the grass and winter shoveled snow. I had to keep my room clean and bed made as well as helping vacuum and dust the rest of the house. Oh, yeah, lug the trash can out front three times a week.

I'm counting the days until I have four sons who are all old enough to take out the trash. Right now the only person who does it is my husband and he's already got a lot on his plate! It's a long walk to our garbage can and with 7 people we create a lot of garbage even though we have 3 recycling bins and yard waste/compost. It's heavy!

I've taken out the garbage MAYBE 5 times in the past 12 years since we moved here. Hmmm...I wonder if 7 is old enough to take it out if I try to cram less into it before we take it out?

As a teenager I did the dishes, did the laundry, cleaned the bathroom, took out the trash, mowed the lawn, shoveled the snow, helped with the garden: hoeing, planting, watering, weeding, picking, helped paper and paint the walls when needed, vacuumed, dusted, washed and waxed the car, helped trim the rose bushes, pampas grass and trees, helped with the canning and preserving: green beans, tomato sauce, pickles, pears, did a lot of cooking, there was little that I didn't do.

Oh, yeah. Kids not having chores is terrible. It breeds laziness and a sense of needing things done for them.