Repeat divorces

I heard somewhere that of the people who remarry after a divorce, something over 60% of them will divorce again.

Why?

Is it because they make the same mistake again?
They're gun shy, and jump at the first sign of disharmony?
Divorce just isn't as scary as they thought, having experienced it once?

My mother has been divorced twice and I can assure you, in her case anyway, it wasn't any of those reasons, she married two completely different guys who she thought were good, and they both turned out to be complete and total bastards that she had to get away from if she was going to keep from going crazy and stay alive.

I think there are a lot of things that factor into it. Marriage is an easy thing to get into & out of now. Some people get married for all the wrong reasons. "All" their friends are married, they've dated for a certain period of time or it just seemed like the thing to do. Then later they realize it wasn't such a good idea but if both agree to it, then it's an easy fix for a fee. Also divorce doesn't have the stigma it once did. You're not a failure or "damaged goods" if you get a divorce. People don't stay in a miserable marriage to keep up appearances or "for the kids" so much. Divorce is so common now it's almost surprising to find someone who hasn't divorced at some point. This is why I don't like hearing certain groups talk about "protecting" marriage because they've done such a piss poor job themselves. But that's another thread.

I think it's just the way divorce is viewed these days. It's common & not the big deal or scandal it was at one time.

It's because marriage is unnatural!

It all depends. My father remarried after he and my mother were divorced. He and my step-mother have been married for 40 years. Paul Newman and his first wife divorced after 11 years. He and Joanne Woodward were married till death it did part them after almost 50 years. The thing that makes me laugh is the people who cheat on their spouses to be together, get divorces so they can marry and then one or both of them cheat in that marriage. Gee, like nobody saw that coming.

I don't really know. Maybe some do jump into things too soon or maybe some get used to being with someone and the thought of being alone causes the to jump into a relationships without thinking it through? I really don't know.

I think some people just like being engaged and planning for a wedding. Once playtime is over and RL sets in, they don't know what to do with themselves in married life.

Chris wrote:I heard somewhere that of the people who remarry after a divorce, something over 60% of them will divorce again.

Why?

Is it because they make the same mistake again?
They're gun shy, and jump at the first sign of disharmony?
Divorce just isn't as scary as they thought, having experienced it once?

It's hard to say exactly why people get married multiple times, but I don't think they necessarily neatly fit into one of those catergories. I think some people fall in love easily in their lives and marriage is the next gradual step.