Question for men especially...

When you are at the beach or the pool, do you look at the women and pick them apart?

Like, do you notice their cellulite and stretch marks and various lumps and think "Why is she here in a swim suit?"

My husband says that he doesn't and guys don't think that way, but I think he's just trying to make me feel better about wearing a swimsuit in public. He's like "All I notice is 'Wow, look at that cherry butt'" (which is another question in itself, do all guys know the difference between a cherry butt and a pear butt? because I'm having the hardest time grasping what he's talking about, I don't see a difference?)

What the hell is a cherry butt? I have never heard that before in my life, I have heard of women being apple shaped or pear shaped but cherry?

Supernova wrote:What the hell is a cherry butt? I have never heard that before in my life, I have heard of women being apple shaped or pear shaped but cherry?

LOL, I know! I was hoping one of the guys here would know, but now I'm thinking that my husband made up the term.

lol, but maybe not!

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080703140314AAclPhP

Somebody has to be really outlandish (to the point of trying to stand out) for me to pay them much mind.

Forgiveness Man wrote:Somebody has to be really outlandish (to the point of trying to stand out) for me to pay them much mind.

so a regular girl in a bathing suit, you'll ignore them?

I'd be lying if I said I never did it, but for the most part I don't. Every now and then someone will just happen to stand out in a very unflattering way, and you can't help but to negatively notice how they look.

JM130ELM wrote:I'd be lying if I said I never did it, but for the most part I don't. Every now and then someone will just happen to stand out in a very unflattering way, and you can't help but to negatively notice how they look.

Okay, like regular every day people wearing a normal bathing suit? Or people wearing things that you would see on a website making fun of people for wearing really unflattering things?

I know that women are super critical and pick each other apart, I'm just wondering if men do that to women too.

thepossiblepolice wrote:

Forgiveness Man wrote:Somebody has to be really outlandish (to the point of trying to stand out) for me to pay them much mind.

so a regular girl in a bathing suit, you'll ignore them?

For the most part yeah. I don't pay regular people at the beach too much mind. (unless I'm in writer mode and then I'm probably thinking up some insane scenarios that could happen at the beach. But that's beside the point. )

Forgiveness Man wrote:

thepossiblepolice wrote:

so a regular girl in a bathing suit, you'll ignore them?

For the most part yeah. I don't pay regular people at the beach too much mind. (unless I'm in writer mode and then I'm probably thinking up some insane scenarios that could happen at the beach. But that's beside the point. )

okay good. I'm just embarrassed because I haven't worn a bathing suit since before the twins were born...And I'm not going to have them there as my beard. I'm going to be all alone with no excuse for why I look the way I do. When my kids are around I feel like people cut me a little slack because I have five kids.

I rationally know that it doesn't matter, but I'm still a little scared.

^^^^Hey, people might look; they might not. To heck with them. lol I'm sure people probably look at me with strange looks. lol Maybe I don't look at them cause I don't want to see them looking at me.

Forgiveness Man wrote:^^^^Hey, people might look; they might not. To heck with them. lol I'm sure people probably look at me with strange looks. lol Maybe I don't look at them cause I don't want to see them looking at me.

lol, probably!

thepossiblepolice wrote:When you are at the beach or the pool, do you look at the women and pick them apart?

Like, do you notice their cellulite and stretch marks and various lumps and think "Why is she here in a swim suit?"

My husband says that he doesn't and guys don't think that way, but I think he's just trying to make me feel better about wearing a swimsuit in public. He's like "All I notice is 'Wow, look at that cherry butt'" (which is another question in itself, do all guys know the difference between a cherry butt and a pear butt? because I'm having the hardest time grasping what he's talking about, I don't see a difference?)

More if the person is trying to wear something that is inappropriate for them. If you weighed 250 lbs and were wearing a string bikini, yeah I’m probably going to be thinking, “Well, I guess she must not have any mirrors in her house.” But I’m also thinking the same thing about a guy who’s so fat you can’t tell he’s wearing a Speedo. But “imperfections” like cellulite, etc.? No, I don’t judge. I ain't perfect either. Hold your head up high!

Alright. I may be gay, but I think I can still say something on this:

Girls get dressed up, do their hair, wear make-up and obsess over their appearance, because they know that other girls will be watching. Men don't care. Men aren't the ones keeping words like slut, bitch, ho, and whore alive-- it's women.

Rockbird wrote:Alright. I may be gay, but I think I can still say something on this:

Girls get dressed up, do their hair, wear make-up and obsess over their appearance, because they know that other girls will be watching. Men don't care. Men aren't the ones keeping words like slut, bitch, ho, and whore alive-- it's women.

haha, I was wondering about that. I know that girls judge, but I also know that with girls, all I have to do is mention my five kids and they "get" it, kwim? A lady will be like, "you have five kids? You look great!" I may not look good for a teenager or a lady in her 20's, but I know I'm doing alright for a 31 yo with five kids, especially twins.

But I was worried about the guys...

Now I found out that the hotel has the spa/sauna in the ladies locker room though so I don't have to worry about it!

Although, I didn't have to worry about it in the first place, I realize, because it's stupid to worry about what other people think of me, especially of my appearance, which is the one thing that I can't really change.

JM130ELM wrote:I'd be lying if I said I never did it, but for the most part I don't. Every now and then someone will just happen to stand out in a very unflattering way, and you can't help but to negatively notice how they look.

This goes for me too. I don't play form judge when I see people at the pool, or physically pick them apart. Usually if I make a negative assessment, it has more to do with the way they're carrying themselves.

Chris wrote:

JM130ELM wrote:I'd be lying if I said I never did it, but for the most part I don't. Every now and then someone will just happen to stand out in a very unflattering way, and you can't help but to negatively notice how they look.

This goes for me too. I don't play form judge when I see people at the pool, or physically pick them apart. Usually if I make a negative assessment, it has more to do with the way they're carrying themselves.

Like not sucking in their stomachs?

alan smithee wrote:

Chris wrote:

JM130ELM wrote:I'd be lying if I said I never did it, but for the most part I don't. Every now and then someone will just happen to stand out in a very unflattering way, and you can't help but to negatively notice how they look.

This goes for me too. I don't play form judge when I see people at the pool, or physically pick them apart. Usually if I make a negative assessment, it has more to do with the way they're carrying themselves.

Like not sucking in their stomachs?

I think I would be more likely to look at someone like they were weird if they were obviously holding in their gut.