Tomorrow sucks already

Tomorrow, a very good friend of mine is going to tell the doctors that he is finished with his cancer treatment. Man, does this suck. I am not exaggerating when I say that he is an excellent man, who deserves to be there for his kids for many, many more years.

I guess my motivation for posting about this is to remind to always, always hold your family and close friends so close and make the most of every moment. We all know this, but I feel that we are all flawed and get caught up in our day to day...we don't call our parents enough, or neglect to call friends just to say "hey" and we just always have to.

Is your friend opting to go off of his cancer treatment prematurely? That is unfortunate (if that is what's happening.) I heard how hellish chemotherapy can be, so I won't pretend to know what he's going through, but if it were I'd suffer through to the bitter end if it meant being able to have that extra time with my children.

Thanks for the reminder, Red. I'm so sorry for the circumstances under which you have to give it.

Sorry to hear that Red. My prayers are with him and his family.

Been there, done that, Red--chemo/cancer does suck, but it also makes you realize what's important in life. Thoughts and prayers going out to your friend!

Thank you so much everyone....

He passed away early Monday morning. I don't think anyone expected that. I find it very poetic that he passed away before he had to tell his wife, daughter and son that he was giving up. Per his daughter's blog, she seemed to worry that extended family/friends would label him a quitter. So, they never had to address that he quit treatment.

Though, the tx options were not life saving, but rather life extending. And to extend his life in a hospital bed, was not what he was wanting. They did have hope that he would have time with them, living unsick from treatment. But that is not how it played out.

Anyway, he left a family that loved him so much and he deserved all of that.

It's small comfort at this time but at least he's at peace. I hope the grief fades soon, replaced with only loving memories for those who knew him.

Alan Smithee wrote: It's small comfort at this time but at least he's at peace. I hope the grief fades soon, replaced with only loving memories for those who knew him.

Thank you so much Alan.

I would only ever admit here that I am feeling so selfish over all this. He was diagnosed almost a year ago. There wasn't a positive note in the whole 10 or 11 months, really. So, I am not shocked other than he passed so fast after deciding he would quit treatment.

So, I am pretty ashamed of myself that I am looking at his passing right now as a hallmark of how men who are being shitty to their family (my son's dad) should check themselves.

Yeah, I know that makes me sound so awful. Just that his passing has come at a time that most people in our social circle would label him and my son's dad as the same type of guy. And I am so pissed and devastated that God took who he did, because my son's dad will NEVER be that good of a family guy.

So, I am ashamed that I am "playing God" in my thoughts. Granted, these thoughts don't detract my sadness for the family...it only is the issue that I am feeling very separated from my belief system.

What kind of cancer did he have?

Esophageal cancer. Never smoked a day in his life and so rarely had a beer. He was the guy (motocross dad) that left the track at six in the morning before practice for that day's race day, to find a church on Sunday.

In the season my son won his first overall championship, years ago, I wrote Morgan's reaction to it in my journal with more detail that I did my own. He was so crazy positive and amazing and his reaction was so strong and positive every day I spent with him and his family. He is a rock star for sure in my eyes.

I guess I'm a little surprised by that as you mentioned about men not getting themselves checked. I was thinking more prostate or colon. I know first hand that a colonoscopy ain't no fun but I'm not going to die of embarrassment. Did he have a persistant cough or other symptoms that he just kept putting off having checked?

No, he was fine. He was just feeling tired after a busy July last year. He went in for tests and learned the unthinkable. In August, they gave him a few months.

So, of course, that wasn't the case.