Sniglets A-L

A sniglet is a word that should be in the dictionary but isn't. Sniglets are the brainchild of comedian Rich Hall who, with a little help from his friends, wrote a series of books containing sniglets in the mid-eighties. While Rich Hall invented the word "sniglet" itself, sniglets are actually a long-running popular joke in which people make up their own humorous words to define things or concepts that have no "official" definitions.

110 At The Equator (won' ten at the ek way' tawr) - n. Any burning sensation experienced directly below the navel when putting on a pair of jeans straight from the dryer.
Accordionated (ah kor' de on ay tid) - adj. Being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time.

Adam 69: n. : Two police cars, parked next to each other, facing opposite directions, in such a way that the drivers side doors are only inches from each other, allowing the officers to chat with each other while waiting for a traffic violation to happen.

Aeroma (ayr oh' ma) - n. The odor emanating from an exercise room after an aerobics workout.

Aeropalmics (ayr o palm' iks) - n. The study of wind resistance conducted by holding a cupped hand out the car window.

Agonosis (ah uh no' sis) - n. The syndrome of tuning into "Wide World of Sports" every Saturday just to watch the skier rack himself.

Airdirt (ayr' dirt) - n. A hanging plant that's been ignored for three weeks or more.

ambivilane - the striped area by an exit ramp where people often pull off when trying to decide "Is this my exit?"

Anaception (an a sep' shun) - n. The body's ability to actually affect television reception by moving about the room.

Animalanche: When you kick your stuffed animals in your sleep and they
fall all over you or the floor. (from Kaffit, age 9)

Anticiparcellate (an ti si par' sel ate) - v. Waiting until the mailman is several houses down the street before picking up the mail, so as not too appear too anxious.

Aquadextrous - adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.

Aqualibrium (ak wa lib' re um) - n. The point where the stream of drinking fountain water is at its perfect height, thus relieving the drinker from (a) having to suck the nozzle, or (b) squirting himself in the eye.

Arachnidiot (ar ak ni' di ot) - n. A person, who, having wandered into an "invisible" spider web, begins gyrating and flailing about wildly.

Attrinyl (a try' nil) - n. (chemical symbol: At) A black, bulletproof, totally inflexible type of plastic, used primarily in covers of pay phone directories.

B+ Stampede (bee' plus stam peed) - n. The attempt by half the classroom to claim the paper with no name on it.

Backspackle (bak' spak uhl) - n. Markings on the back of one's shirt from riding a fenderless bicycle.

Baldage (bald' aj) - n. The accumulation of hair in the drain after showering.

Bargue (bar' gyoo) - v. To whine, fuss, and complain a great deal while at the same time trying to get someone to see your point of view. Ex: The young child bargued with his father until his father gave in and let him stay up past his bedtime.

Bazookacidal Tendencies (bah zew' kuh sy dal ten' den seez) - n. The overwhelming desire of most individuals to reach out and pop the gigantic gum bubble billowing from someone's mouth.

Beavo (bee' vo) - n. A pencil with teeth marks all over it.

Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at 3 in the morning and cannot be cast out.

Begathon - n. A multi-day event on public television, used to raise money so you won't have to watch commercials.

Bevemeter - The distance a coaster will stick to the bottom of a wet glass before falling to the table.

Bimp (bimp) - n. A blurry or "double-edged" felt-tip marker

Bixplex (biks' pleks) - n. Psychological block in which a person cannot choose which color of disposable lighter to purchase.

Bleemus (blee' mus) - n. The disgusting film on the top of soups and cocoa that sit out for too long.

Blithwapping - v. Using anything BUT a hammer to hammer a nail into the wall, such as shoes, lamp bases, doorstops, etc.

Blivett (blih' vit) - v. To turn one's pillow over and over, looking for the cool spot.

Blooage (blew' ij) - n. The residue left on fingers after using an S.O.S pad.

Blossor - n. The hair style one has after removing a baseball cap.

Blurfle (bler' ful) - v. To be caught talking at the top of one's lungs when the music at the bar or disco suddenly stops.

Bomca (bahm' ka) - n. A lubricant derived from the salivary gland used for turning book pages.

Boomerangst : The unrelieved dissatisfaction of those born during the Baby Boomer era, wherein the situation they brought upon themselves and others - no matter how hard they attempt to rid themselves of it - comes back to smack them in the ass. Hard.

Bovilexia (bo vil eks' e uh) - n. The uncontrollable urge to lean out the car window and yell "Moo!" every time you pass a cow.

Bowlikinetics (boh lih kih neh' tiks) - n. The act of trying to control a released bowling ball by twisting one's body in the direction one wants it to go.

Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

Brakenoia (Brak e noia) (v) The act or urge of stepping on the brake on the passenger side of the car

Brattled (brat' uld) - adj. The unsettling feeling, at a stoplight, that the busload of kids that just pulled up beside you is making fun of you.

Brazel (brah' zul) - n. The scratch plate on a matchbook.

Brimplet (brim' plit) - n. A frayed shoelace that must be moistened to pass through a shoe eyelet.

Brumby - n. The fake antique plastic seal on a pretentious whiskey bottle.

Buffle - n. The Butter trapped in a squaffle of a waffle

Bugpedal (bug' ped uhl) - v. To accelerate or decelerate rapidly in an attempt to remove a clinging insect from a car's windshield.

Bumperglints (bump' ur glintz) - n. The small reflective obstacles in the middle of interstate highways which supposedly keep drivers awake and on track.

Burbulation - n. The obsessive act of opening and closing a refrigerator door in an attempt to catch it before the automatic light comes on.

Burgacide - n. What you call the desperate action of a hamburger leaping to its death through the holes in the Bar-B-Q grill.

Bursploot (ber' sploot) - v. To position one's thumb at the end of a garden hose to increase the pressure.

Busblender (bus' blend dur) - n. The device at the front of the bus that tosses your fare around for a while, then swallows it.

Cabnicreep (kab' nih kreep) - n. The structural condition in which the closing of one kitchen cabinet causes another to open.

Caffidget (ka fij' it) - v. To break up a Styrofoam coffee cup into several hundred pieces after consuming its contents.

Carbonicles-the tiny drops of soda thrown into the air above your glass
after you pour it

Carcreak - n. Those crackling, tinkling, creaky noises your car makes after you park and turn it off.

Careena (ka reen' uh) - n. Any mangled or missing piece of highway guard rail.

Carperpetuation (kar' pur pet u a shun) - n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.

Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

Cereoallocative (ser r o al' o ka tuv) - adj. Describes the ability of a seasoned breakfast eater to establish a perfect cereal/banana ratio, assuring there will be at least one slice of banana left for the final spoonful of cereal.

Chalktrauma (chawk' traw ma) - n. The body's reaction to someone running his fingernails down a chalkboard.

Charp (charp) - n. The green, mutant potato chip found in every bag.

Cheedle (chee' dul) - n. The residue left on one's fingertips after consuming a bag of Cheetos.

Cheeriomagnetism - the quality of cereal that causes the last five Cheerios in the bowl to clump together.

Chiclexodus (Chick-ul-EXodus) The act of a gumball falling from the gumball machine onto the floor after a coin is inserted and the knob turned, while one forgets to place his hand under the little door.

Chipfault (chip' fawlt) - n. The stress point on a potato chip where it breaks off and stays behind in the dip.

Choconiverous - adj. Biting off the head of the chocolate Easter bunny first.

Chwads (chwadz) - n. The small, disgusting wads of chewed gum commonly found beneath table and counter tops.

Cigadent (sig' a dent) - n. Any accident involving a cigarette: for instance when it sticks to your lips while your fingers slide off and get burned.

Cinemuck - n. The combination of popcorn, soda, and melted chocolate which covers the floors of movie theaters.

Circuloin Technique (sur' kew loyn tek neek') - n. The popular approach to steak dining in which one eats around the edges first, then works his way toward the middle.

Circumpopulate (sur kum pop' yew layt') - v. To finish off a Popsicle "laterally" because the "frontal" approach causes one to gag.

Cleanundrum (clean-un-drum) The act of cleaning up a room or closet and then not being able to find something that you knew where it was before you decided to clean

Clunes - n., pl. People who just won't go.

Combiloops (kom' bih lewps) - n. The two or three unsuccessful passes before finally opening a combination locker.

Conagraphs (kohn' a grafs) - n. The raised relief squares on an ice cream cone.

The Cranial Stomp (the kray' nee uhl stomp) - n. A somewhat primitive dance performed by youngsters trying to step on the heads of their shadows.

Crayolla (kray oh' lee uh) - n. The area on the refrigerator where kindergarten drawings are displayed.

Creedles (kre' dulz) - n. The colony of microscopic indentations on a golf ball.

Crinks (krinks) - n. Crevices and junctions where car wax gets in but doesn't get out.

Crummox (noun): The amount of cereal leftover in the box that is too little to eat and too much to throw away

Crutsoglio- n. the crusty, dried concoction on the tip of a lotion dispenser

Cubelo (kyew' beh lo) - n. The one cube left by the person too lazy to refill the ice tray.

Cushup (kush' up) - v. To sit down on a couch somehow causing the cushion next to you to rise.

Darf (darf) - n. The least attractive side of a Christmas tree that ends up facing the wall.

Decaflon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

Deodorend - n. The last 1/2 inch of stick deodorant that won't turn up out of the tube, and thus cannot be used without inducing lacerations.

Destinesia (des tin e sha) n. When you go somewhere, then upon arrival, forget why you went there.

Detruncus (de trunk' us) - n. The embarrassing phenomenon of losing one's bathing shorts while diving into a swimming pool.

Digitritus (dij ih tree' tus) - n. Deposits found between the links of a watchband.

Dillrelict (dil rel' ikt) - n. The last pickle in the jar that avoids all attempts to be captured.

Dipwavers (dip' way vurz) - n. People who raise their hands when riding on roller coasters.

Discolexic - a person who likes music by the "Gee Bees"

Doork (dawrk) - n. A person who always pushes on a door marked "pull" or vice versa.

Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

Droot (drewt) - n. A Dorito with an unnatural fold in it.

Dunkinhackin- v. The violent coughing attack caused by inhaling the dust on a powdered donut.

E-bage (ee' bage) n. - : An addiction to electronic devices.

Eddihate - v. To turn off the stereo or television set when a Crazy Eddie commercial appears.

Efforex - n., v. Substitute.

Eiffelites (eye' ful eyetz) - n. Gangly people sitting in front of you at the movies who, no matter what direction you lean in, follow suit.

Ejoculation - n.The way a man's eyes behave when a man stares wildly at something of his interest (e.g. car, woman).

Elbonics - n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.

Ellacelleration: The mistaken belief that repeatedly pressing the elevator button will make it go faster

Elmerdermis (el mur durm' is) - n. The white sheath that surrounds the nozzle of a glue dispenser.

Erdu (uhr' dew) - n. The leftover accumulation of rubber particles after erasing a mistake on a test paper.

Essoasso - n. any person who drives through a corner gas station to avoid stopping at the intersection.

Eufirstics (yew fur' stiks) - n. Two people waiting on the phone for the other to hang up first.

Exaspirin (eks as' prin) - n. Any bottle of pain reliever with an impossible-to-remove cotton wad at the top.

Execuglide (eks ek' yew glyd)- v. To propel oneself about an office without getting up from the chair.

Expresshole-n. A person who goes through the grocery store's 12-item express lane with 22 items.

Facon - n. The fake bacon bits served at cheap salad bars

Famamage (fa mam' aj) - v. To eliminate any annoying engine noise by simply turning up the volume of the radio.

Fenderberg - n. The large glacial deposits that form on the insides of car fenders during snowstorms.

Ferroles (fer' olz) - n. The holes in the bottom of a steam iron.

Fetchplex (fech' pleks) - n. State of momentary confusion in a dog whose owner has faked throwing the ball and palmed it behind his back.

Fictate (fik' tayt) - v. To inform a television or screen character of impending danger under the assumption they can hear you.

Finnage (fin' aj) - n. The act of watching your money swallowed up as your groceries ride the conveyor belt at the supermarket.

Flabalanche What happens when a fat guy loosens his belt

Flammabyte - n. That ever changing address in memory which always causes programs to blow up.

Flannister - n. The plastic yoke that holds a six-pack of beer together.

Flarpswitch (flarp' switch) - n. The one light switch in every house with no function whatsoever.

Flen (flen) - n. (chemical symbol: Fl) The black crusty residue that accumulates on the necks of old catsup bottles.

Flimps (flimps) - n. People (usually observed in waiting rooms) who have advanced the Evelyn Wood technique to the point where they can flip through a magazine without ever looking down from the clock.

Flintstep (flint' step) - v. To wind up one's feet before running away in fear. Common among cartoon characters.

Floles (flolz) - n. The extra (fourth and fifth) holes in notebook paper. Created in the hopes that one day mankind will perfect a "five ring binder".

Flopcorn (flop' korn) - n. The unpopped kernels at the bottom of the cooker.

Flosstitution V. Using anything other than the waxed string product , i.e matchbook covers, etc. to clean between your teeth.

Flotion (flo' shun) - n. The tendency when sharing a waterbed to undulate for five minutes every time the other person moves.

Flotta Factor (flah' ta fak' tur) - n. The proven scientific fact that at a self-service pump, the last ten cents take longer to reach the tank than the first twelve dollars' worth.

Flurrant (fluhr' uhnt) - n. The one leaf that always clings to the end of the rake.

Fods (fahdz) - n. Couples at amusement parks who wear identical T-shirts, presumably to keep from getting lost.

Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

Foys (foyz) - n. Missing pieces of a jigsaw puzzle that you later find stuck to the underside of your arm.

Frankfluid (frank flew' id) - n. The liquid at the bottom of hot dog packages.

Fraznit (frahs' nit) - n. Any string hanging from an article of clothing which when pulled causes the article to completely unravel.

fridgescum (fridge-scum): the gooey mess on the shelf in the refridgerator that holds the condiments.

Fridgedalien....Anything stored in the refrigerator that is not a food product. i.e. Photography film, batteries, etc.

Frust (n): The line of dust that accumulates when sweeping dust into a dust pan and frustratingly backs you up because you can never get it into the pan.

Frustra (frus' trah) - n. The special plastic used in the manufacture of fast-food ketchup packets.

Fuffle (fuh' ful) - v. To assume, when dining out, that you are making things easier on the waitress by using the phrase "when you get a chance..."

Furbling - v. Having to wander through a maze of ropes at an airport or bank even when you are the only person in line.

Furbula (fer' byew luh) - n. The designated chewing area on a dog's back.

Furterus Zone (fer ter' us zohn) - n. The empty stretches of bun on either end of a hot dog.

Gapiana (ga pee ah' nah) - n. The unclaimed strip of land between the "you are now leaving" and "welcome to" signs when crossing state lines.

Gazinta (gah zin' tuh) - n. Mathematical symbol for division; also the sound uttered when dividing out loud. (Example: "Four gazinta eight twice.") (ed. note: this one came from Leigh in Australia. As a Canadian I would say "Gozinta)

Genderplex - n. The predicament of a person in a restaurant who is unable to determine his or her designated restroom (e.g. turtles and tortoises).

Gertatious (gur tay' shus) - adj. Having the adolescent fear that hanging one's arm over the bed at night will mean being dragged under.

Gibble (jib' buhl) - n. The sliding keyhole cover on a car trunk.

Gimplexus (gim plek' sis) - n. Rear area of thighs, which must be peeled from car seat on hot summer days.

Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

Gizzledipplers (gih' zul dip lurz) - n. Those annoying waving hands seen on the back of Winnebagos (placed there by people too lazy to be friendly on their own).

Glackett (glak' it) - n. The noisy ball inside a spray-paint can.

Gladhandling (glad' han dling) - n. To attempt, with frustrating results, to find and separate the ends of a plastic sandwich or trash bag.

Glamp (glamp) - n. The telescopic device used to retrieve golf balls from ponds.

glassable - n. anything that a parent tells a child not to go near because it can be broken (especially something made of glass)

Glibido: All talk and no action.

Gleemites - n. Petrified deposits of toothpaste found in sinks.

Gleemule (glee' mule) - n. (a unit of measure) One unit of toothpaste, measured from bristle to bristle. (Not to be confused with GLEEMITES, which are petrified deposits of toothpaste found in sinks.)

Grackles (grak' elz) - n. The wrinkles that appear on the body after staying in water too long.

Grainy (gray' nee) adj. - : A gray (overcast) and rainy day.

Grantnap (grant' nap) - n. The extra five minutes of sleep you allow yourself that somehow makes all the difference in the world.

Greelite (gree' lite) - n. The eerie glow that emanates from beneath escalator steps.

Grintiger (grin' tuh jer) - n. The numbered code on the back of a greeting card that, when deciphered, reveals the price.

Gription (grip' shun) - n. The sound of sneakers squeaking against the floor during basketball games.

Grisknob (grisd' nahb) - n. The end of a chicken drumstick which always gives the appearance of having more chicken on it.

Gromaxes (grom' ack sis) - n. Inside area of knees used to grip steering wheel when holding a map.

Gummerator (gum' uhr ay ter) - n. The pointed rubber object on the end of some toothbrushes.

Gurmlish - n. The red warning flag at the top of a club sandwich which prevents the person from biting into it and puncturing the roof of his mouth.

Gurple (gur' pul) n. - : A gray-ish purple color.

Gweek - n. A coat hanger recycled as a car aerial.

Gyroped (jy'roh ped) - n. A kid who cannot resist spinning around on a diner stool.

Hacula (hak' yew luh) - n. The last few inches of tape measure or lawn mower cord that refuses to rewind automatically.

Hangle (hang' ul) - n. A cluster of coat hangers.

Hangnibble: to chew one tiny bit of hangnail, usually resulting in a prodigious amount of blood loss.

Hempennant (hem' pen ent) - n. Any coattail, cuff, or dress hem dangling outside the door of a moving vehicle.

Hoaraxiomist - n. A Person who reasons about the meaning of programs.

Hozone (ho' zohn) - n. The place where one sock in every laundry load disappears to.

Hudnut (hud' nuht) - n. The leftover bolt or screw in any "some assembly required" project.

Hydralation (hi dra lay' shun) - n. Acclimating oneself to a cold swimming pool by bodily regions: toe-to-knee, knee-to-waist, waist-to-elbow, elbow-to-neck.

Hystioblogination (his' te o blahg in ay' shun) - n. The act of trying to identify a gift by holding it to your ear and shaking it.

Icision (ih sih' zhun) - n. Delicate operation performed on Neapolitan-flavored ice cream in which one entire flavor is precisely and systematically removed.

Idiolocator n.- The symbol on a mall or amusement park map representing "You Are Here"

Idiot Box - n. The part of the envelope that tells a person where to place the stamp when they can't quite figure it out for themselves.

ienvy (i-envy): the jealousy a person with a normal cell phone has when his friend or partner is on their iphone.

Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Inkslick (ink' slik) - n. A greasy spot on a piece of stationery or test paper.

Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

Irant (eye' rant) - n. A seamless pistachio; a pistachio nut afraid to come out in public.

itard (i-tard): somone who is using an iphone and has no idea how to operate the device.

JB point- (J B/ just because- poynt' ) - n. The point at which the parent of a child within the midst of a pediquerey is pushed to shout "Just because!" or, "Because God made it that way!"

Jiffylust (ji' phee lust) - n. The inability to be the first person to carve into a brand-new beautiful jar of peanut butter.

Joes of Arc (johz' uhv ark) - n. Tiny drops of Mr. Coffee that die on the burner after the pot is removed.

Jukejitters (jook' jit erz) - n. Fear that everyone thinks that you picked the awful tune emanating from the jukebox when it was actually the person before you.

Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

Kawashock (kah wah shahk') - n. Pulling into the last remaining parking spot only to discover a motorcycle there.

Kedophobia (ked oh fo' be uh) - n. The fear of having one's sneakers eaten by the teeth on the escalator.

Kernelkling (kur nuhl' kling) - n. The shell of a kernel in a bowl or bag of popcorn that seems spot-welded to the roof of one's mouth, and cannot be removed without the making of cat-like hissing noises in an attemp to lessen the suction of said kernel

Keyfruit (kee' froot) - n. The one apple, pear, or tomato in the stand that, when removed, causes all the others to tumble forward.

Knuck (nuk) - n. Ice cream collected on the back of the hand when scraping the last portions from the box.

Krogling (kroh' gling) - n. The nibbling of small items of fruit and produce at the supermarket, which the customer considers "free sampling" and the owner considers "shoplifting".

Krogt - n. The metallic silver coating found on fast-food game cards.

Lactomangulation - n. Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk carton so badly that one has to resort to using the "illegal" side.

Laminites (lam' in itz) - n. Those strange people who show up in the photo section of brand-new wallets.

Limalope (ly' muh lohp) - n. The disgusting foreskin on a lima bean.

Linenee (lih nen ee') - n. The member of a two-person folding team at the laundromat who takes the sheet and completes the fold.

Lodgecombing (loj' coh ming) - n. Final reconnaissance before vacating a motel room.

Loggium (log' yum) - n. Water that drips from one's nose hours after swimming.

Lorp (lawrp) - n. The part of the shoe that collapses when you try to pull it on without a shoehorn.

Lotshock (laht' shahk) - n. The act of parking your car, walking away, and then watching it roll past you.

Lub (lub) - n. The small deposit of spinach that lodges itself between one's teeth.

Luposlipaphobia - n. The fear of being pursued by timber wolves around a kitchen table while wearing socks on a newly waxed floor.