Sniglets M-Z

Maggit (mag' it) - n. Any of the hundreds of subscription cards that fall from the pages of a magazine. (pl. MAGGREGATE)

Magnocartic - n. Any automobile that, when left unattended, attracts shopping carts.

Malibugaloo (mal ih boo' guh lew) - n. A dance that affects barefoot beachgoers on hot summer days.

Manillium (mah nil' ee yum) - n. The lifespan of the clasp on a manila envelope before it breaks off and dies.

Marp (marp) - n. The impossible-to-find beginning of a roll of cellophane tape.

Mastacambulistophile - n. Someone who walks while eating, as from the local coffee and donut stand back to his office.

Mattrescotting (mat' res kot ing) - n. The pattern of gray and white lines on an institutional mattress.

Maypop (may' pop) - n. A bald tire.

Maytag-netic Field- the mysterious force that causes dryer lint to stick to itself when someone cleans the lint filter.

Memnents -n The small broken pieces at the bottom of an M&M bag

Methylphobia (meth il fo' be uh) - n. The fear that you are going to have to pay for the one cent you over-pumped at the self-service station.

Microtrek (my' kro trek) - n. Any nervous trip to the microwave oven to make sure the food hasn't incinerated.

Microts (my' krotz) - n. The two thumbnail-sized pieces you end up with when trying to remove a paper towel in a public washroom.

Mimoids (mim' oydz) - n. People addicted to the smell of newly mimeographed test papers.

Mittsquinter - n. A ballplayer who looks into his glove after missing the ball, as if, somehow, the cause of the error lies there.

M&Nyms - n. Any candy made alot like M&Ms, but different, i.e., Skittles or Reese's Pieces. (sent by Brian Marsh)

Mopeeps (moh' peeps) - n. People compelled to look through the curtain opening of your motel room as they pass by.

Mophenes (mo' feenz) - n. The semi-truck headlights that invade your motel room at three in the morning.

Motspur (mot' sper) - n. The pesky fourth wheel on a shopping cart that refuses to cooperate with the other three.

Mowmuffins (mo' muh finz) - n. The dried accumulation of grass on the underside of lawn mowers.

Mozzalastics (maht suh las' tiks) - n. Large deposits of cheese that stick to the top of the pizza box.

Multipochoholes (mul ti po' cho holz) - n. Wounds left in the test papers from overerasing.

Mummabolic chorus (mum uh bah' lik ko' rus) - n. When three or more people are singing along to a tune and suddenly discover they are all faking their way through the unintelligible lyrics.

Mumphreys (mum' freez) - n. (a useless sniglet) Those strange extra digits you find on push-button phones.

Musquirt (mus' kwirt) - n. The water that comes out of the initial squirts of a squeeze mustard bottle.

Mustation--a person who should always have a mustache

Mustgo - n. Any item of food that has been sitting in the refrigerator so long it has become a science project.

Napression Marks (n): Those indentation lines on your face created by your bedding when you when you wake up.

Narcolepulacy (nar ko lep' ul ah see) - n. The contagious action of yawning, causing everyone in sight to also yawn.

Negatile (neh' guh tyl) - n. An area of the bathroom floor where, somehow, the scale registers you five pounds lighter.

Neoice (nee oh ice') - n. Any ice cube removed before its time that upon close examination, resembles a carpenter's level.

Nerb n. a noun used as a verb. For example: They didn't language the proclamation very well. nerb, nerbing, nerbed v. the act of using nouns as verbs in a sentence.

Netsec - n. A Unit of time used in indicating work time lost due to reading net.jokes

Neutron Peas (new' tron peez) - n. Tiny green objects in TV dinners that remain frozen even when the rest of the food has been microwaved beyond recognition.

Nevitts (nev' itz) - n. The sandpaper-like deposits on a cat's tongue.

Newswafer - an old newspaper that stays on a drive way so long that cars drive over it and turn it into a flattened pile of pulp. The only way to pick it up is with a snow shovel.

Nicometer (nik oh mee' tee awr) - n. A cigarette that exits though a car's front window and reenters through the back.

Nifleck (nih' flek) - n. The unmarked domino in the set.

Niz (niz) - n. An annoying hair at the top of a movie screen.

Nizzlebrill (nih' zuhl bril) - n. The "night-day" switch on a rearview mirror.

Nocturnuggets (nok' ter nuh gitz) - n. Deposits found in one's eye upon awakening in the morning, also called: GOZZAGAREENA, OPTIGOOK, EYEHOCKEY, etc.

Nugloo (nug' lew) - n. Single continuous eyebrow that covers the entire forehead. Also known as a Unibrow.

Numismatist: N. A person with the uncanny ability to get others to voluntarily give them money.

Ocrapment- n. The attachment that you send with the second email after being informed that you failed to attach it to your first email.

Omnibiblious - adj. Indifferent to type of drink. "Oh, you can get me anything. I'm omnibiblious."

Oopzama (ewp' za muh) - n. Sudden scratching of scalp or face upon realization that the person you were waving at isn't who you thought it was.

Opling (op' pling) - n. The act, when feeding a baby, of opening and closing one's mouth, smacking one's lips and making "yummy" noises, in the hope that baby will do the same.

Optortionist (op tor' shun ist) - n. The kid in school who can turn his eyelids inside out.

Oreosis (awr ee oh' sis) - n. The practice of eating the cream center of an Oreo before eating the cookie outsides.

Orogami (or oh ga' mee) - n. The miraculous folding process that allows Kleenexes to methodically emerge from the box one ate a time.

Orosuctuous (or oh suk' chew us) - adj. Being able to hold a glass to one's face by sheer lung power.

Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.

Otisosis (oh tis oh' sis) - n. The inability to meet anyone else's eyes in an elevator.

P-spot (pee' spaht) - n. The area directly above the urinal in public restrooms that men stare at, knowing a glance in any other direction would arouse suspicion.

Pajangle (pah jan' gul) - n. Condition of waking up with your pajamas turned 180 degrees.

Passholes - definition, People that pass you while driving then pull in front of you and then slow down (slower than you were driving)

Pedexpres​sion(ped ehx presh' shun) - n. The helpless look on the face of one's pet, that is being played with by rowdy children, as if to say "help!"

Pediquerey (pehd' eh kweer ee) - n. The continuation of one's child to ask "why?" no matter what the answer to the last "why?", commonly asked about a subject that does not matter.

Pediddel - n. A car with only one working headlight.

Pelutho - n. A South American ball game. The balls are whacked against a brick wall with a stout wooden bat until the prisoner confesses.

Penciventilation (pen si ven ti lay' shun) - n. The act of blowing on the tip of a pencil after sharpening it.

Pepperlonely...the piece of pepperoni left on the cardboard when you pick up a piece of pizza.

Perkuburp (n): the burb that a percolator (now archaic) makes when it's finished.

Permapression (pur' muh preh shun) - n. The discovery that there is no real difference in the various cycles of your washing machine.

Petonic (peh ton' ik) - adj. One who is embarrassed to undress in front of a household pet.

Petribar - n. Any sun-bleached prehistoric candy that has been sitting in the window of a vending machine too long.

Petrool (pet' rul) - n. The slow, seemingly endless strand of motor oil at the end of the can.

Pewtone (pyu tone') - n. (chemical symbol: Pu) A major atmospheric component of towns with paper mills.

Philopologist (fil ah pahl' ah jist) - n. A specialist who loads people onto amusement rides.

Phistel (fis' tul) - n. The brake pedal on the passenger side of the car that you wish existed when you're riding with a lunatic.

Phonesia (fo nee' zhuh) - n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.

Phosflink - v. To flick a bulb on and off when it burns out (as if, somehow, that will bring it back to life).

Photoyokel (fo to yo' kul) - n. A person who presses the wrong button on a film camera causing it to dismantle.

Phozzle (fo' zul) - n. The buildup of dust on a record needle.

Picklettulance (pik ul et' yu lans) - n. The ability to remember the entire family's order at a fast-food restaurant.

Pielibrium (pu lih' bree uhm) - n. The point at which the crust on a wedge of pie outweighs the filling and tips it over. -Rick Bamford

Piepushers (py' puh shurz) - n. Attendants at fast-food restaurants who, no matter what you order, try to unload apple or cherry turnovers on you.

Piewagon (py' wa gun) - n. The small vehicle that carries games pieces around a Trivial Pursuit board.

Pifflesquit (pif' ul skwit) - n. The wire net surrounding the cork of a champagne bottle.

Pigslice (pig' slys) - n. The last unclaimed piece of pizza that everyone is secretly dying for.

Pillsburglar (pilz' berg ler) - n. Person able to sample the icing on a new cake without leaving a fingerprint.

PIYAN (pi' an) - n. (acronym: "Plus If You Act Now") Any miscellaneous item thrown in on a late night television ad.

Polarind (poh' luh rynd) - n. The peeling on a polaroid snapshot.

Postalports (poh' stul pawrtz) - n. The annoying windows in envelopes that never line up with the address.

Prema-cheerio or Toodle-oops - n. The uncomfortable silence shared by two people after they've said good-bye to each other and continue to walk together out of necessity. (Scott Ellis)

Premail (pree' mayl) - n. Mail that is placed behind the visor in the car and left for several months before it is finally sent.

Prestofrigeration: The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning to the refrigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized.

Pretzaline (pret sah leen') - n. The salt deposit at the bottom of a bag of pretzels.

Primpo (prim' po) - n. A person who passes a mirror then has to step back, presumably to reassure himself he still exists.

Proximipee: the closer you get to the bathroom, the worse you have to go. (axiom: the need to pee increases exponentially versus the rate at which the distance to the bathroom diminishes.)

Pulpid (puhl' pid) - n. A kid who enjoys the carton more than the item that came in it.

Puntificate (puhn tih' fih kayt) - v. To try to predict in what direction a football will bounce.

Pupkus (pup' kus) - n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.

Purpitation - v. To take something off the grocery shelf, decide you don't want it, and then put it in another section.

Queery n. A question to ascertain one's sexual orientation.

Reled (ree led') - v. To reset all the digital clocks in the household following a power failure.

Rehomeulate - The act of being released from the hospital to go home.

Retrocarbonic (ret ro kar bon' ik) - n. Any drink machine that dispenses the soda before the cup.

Rignition (rig ni' shun) - n. The embarrassing action of trying to start one's car with the engine already running.

Roebinks (roh' binks) - n. Those mysterious chimes you always hear in department stores.

Rovalert (ro' val urt) - n. The system whereby one dog can quickly establish an entire neighborhood network of barking.

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Sark (sark) - n. The marks left on one's ankle after wearing tube socks all day.

Scribblics (skrih' bliks) - n. Warm-up exercises designed to get the ink in a pen flowing.

Scribline - n. The blank area on the back of credit cards where one's signature goes.

Shirmers - n., pl. Tall young men who stand around smiling at weddings as if to suggest that they know the bride rather well.

SHMIDDLE: noun The hole in the center of a bagel. "The cream cheese was oozing out from the shmiddle."

Shocklet (shahk' lit) - n. The seldom-used third hole on an electrical outlet.

Shoefly (shew' fliy) - n. The aeronautical terminology for a football player who misses the punt and launches his shoe instead.

Shrennen: Paper or otherwise fallen debris, that appears after revelers at the St. Patrick's Day parade.

Shuzma (shuhz' muh) - n. The portion of window cleaner that the spray tube can no longer reach.

Sirlines (sir' lines) - n. The lines on a grilled steak.

Slackjam (slak' jam) - n. The condition of being trapped in one's own trousers while trying to pull them on without first removing shoes.

Slopweaver (lsahp' wee vuhr) - n. Someone who has mastered the art of repositioning the food on his plate to give the appearance of having consumed a good portion of it.

Slottery and Vendication (slot' er ee and ven' di kay shun) - n. A public misdemeanor in which a person gambles on a vending machine, loses, and tries to exact revenge by kicking it.

Slurch (slerch) - n. The combination "ouch" and slurping noise one makes when eyeing someone else's bad sunburn.

Slurm - n. The slime that accumulates on the underside of a soap bar when it sits in the dish too long.

Snackmosphere (snak' moh sfeer) - n. The empty but explosive layer of air at the top of a potato chip bag.

Snacktrek - n. The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning to the refrigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized.

Snargle (snar' gul) - v. To lessen the visual impact of a horror movie by filtering it through one's fingers.

Sniglet (snig'lit) - n. Any word that doesn't appear in the dictionary, but should.

Snigletologists-people who have nothing better to do than sit around
thinking up sniglets

Snough- Sneezing and coughing at the same time.

Snuggage (snuh 'gaj) - n. The act of retying both shoestrings when only one needed it.

Sofuse n. The coins, combs, bobby pins and other detritus that is discovered in the corners under the seat cushions of a sofa, davenport or settee.

Somnambapologist (som nam ba pol' uh jist) - n. Person too polite to admit he was sleeping even when awakened at three in the morning.

Spagellum (spa gel' um) - n. The loose strand on each forkful of spaghetti that beats one about the chin and whiskers.

Spagmumps - n. Any of the millions of Styrofoam wads that accompany mail-order items.

Speclums (spek' lums) - n. The miniscule bumps on a strawberry.

Speraws (sper' awz) - n. The pinched marks on the ends of hot dogs.

Spirobits - n. The frayed bits of left-behind paper in a spiral notebook.

Spirtle - n. The fine stream from a grapefruit that always lands right in your eye.

Spood (spewd) - n. Flat wooden "spoon" that accompanies ice cream cups.

Sprout Lines (sprowt lynz) - n. Visible lines at the bottom of trouser legs where the hems have been let down.

Spudrubble (spud' rubb uhl) - n. Unclaimed french fries at the bottom of a fastfood bag.

Squaffles (skwa' felz) - n. The individual squares comprising a waffle.

Squalkeenus (skwal ke' nus) - n. The shock syndrome that comes from biting into a popsicle with one's front teeth.

Squanderprint (skwan' duhr print) - n. Directions that try to make you use up a product faster than you normally would. (Ex.: Apply shampoo. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.)

Squatcho (skwatch' oh) - n. (another useless sniglet) The button at the top of a baseball cap.

Squatic Diversion (skwa' tik dy vur' zhun) - n. Any pretended activity that commands a dog owner's attention while the dog relieves itself on a neighbor's lawn.

Squigger (skiwg' uhr) - n. A cherry tomato that explodes upon contact with a fork.

sticsin - the last raisin that sticks to the bottom of the box.

Stroodle (stru' dul) - n. The annoying strand of cheese stretching from a slice of hot pizza to one's mouth.

Subnougate (sub new' get) - v. To eat the bottom caramels in a candy box and carefully replace the top level, hoping no one will notice.

Swaznia (swaz' nuh) - n. The thin, disgusting membrane that connects the bottom of the tongue to the top of the jaw, presumably to hold it in place.

Table Snorkeling (tay' bul snawrk' ling) - n. Frantic gesticulations when one bites into hot food and has to take in air to cool it off.

Telecrastination (tel e kras tin ay' shun) - n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.

Telepression - n. The deep-seated guilt which stems from knowing that you did not try hard enough to "look up the number on your own" and instead put the burden on the directory assistant.

Telletiquette (tel et' ih ket) - n. The polite distance kept by one person behind another at an automatic teller machine (so as not to be suspected of trying to glimpse that person's secret code).

tepidacious (tep-i-da-shus): the act of setting the water temperature too cold before you enter the shower to ensure that you don't get burned.

Testlice (test' lys) - n. Those tiny bugs that invade your hair when you're taking an exam.

Thermalophobia (thur muh lo fo' be uh) - n. The fear when showering that someone will sneak in, flush the toilet, and scald you to death.

Thinkogasm: A Great Idea.

Thrickle (thri' kel) - n. The itch in the back of the throat which can't be scratched without making disgusting barnyard-type noises.

Tidnab - n. The opposite of a bandit; one who surreptitiously leaves items, as a neighbor who leaves some of his bumper crop of summer squash on your doorstep.

Tilecomet (n): the piece of tolietpaper that clings to your foot after you've left a public restroom

Traficulous - the condition that exists while driving, when you are trying to pull out through an intersection where it is clear to the right but not to the left, then it is clear to the left but not the right then the same over and over again.

Tricklemicrochips - n. Those little tiny broken pieces of Doritos that seem to trickle to the bottom of the bag or bowl no matter what.

Turfigee and Pedigee (ter' fih jee and ped' ih jee) - n. The two extreme target points of a rotary lawn sprinkler, TURFIGEE being the safest point at which to walk past, PEDIGEE being the most dangerous.

Twinch (twinch) - n. The movement a dog makes with its head when it hears a high-pitched noise.

Uclipse (yew' klips) - n. The dangerous arc into another lane made by drivers just before executing a turn.

Ufluation (yu flu ay' shun) - n. The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning to the refigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized.

Uhfage (uff' aj) - n. The unit for determining a television's age, that is, the amount of time it takes for the picture to appear once the set has been turned on.

Umbrace (uhm' brays) - n. The small strap that holds an umbrella in place.

Upuls (yu' puls) - n. The blank pages at the beginning and end of books, presumably placed there so you can rewrite the ending.

Vacation Elbow (vay kay' shun el' bo) - n. A condition that suddenly develops in a father's arm during a vacation trip that allowed him to reach out and slap you from incredible distances.

Vegiludes - n. Individual peas or kernels of corn that you end up chasing all over the plate with your fork.

Voitlock (voyt' lok) - n. When the basketball gets lodged between the rim and the backboard.

Waftic (wahf' tik) - adj. Describes any person in whose direction campfire or barbeque smoke always blows.

Warbloid (war' bloyd) - n. The tiny device in cassette players that eats tapes.

Waterpuss (wa' ter puss)a feline that is fond of water. - Robyn, age 10

Wattbobble (wat' bah bul) - v. To remove a hot light bulb by turning it several seconds, letting your fingers cool, then repeating the process. This is generally followed by the glorious revelation of using your shirttail.

waxident (wax-i-dent): when a dripping candle leaves a waxy residue on the table.

Werxilation (wurks ul ay' shun) - n. The property of some screen doors to start to slam shut only to catch themselves at the last moment and "float" to a gentle close.

Woowad (wew' wad) - n. Giant clumps of stuck-together rice served at Chinese restaurants.

Yardribbons (yard rib' onz) - n. The unmowed patches of grass discovered after one has put away the mower.

Yinkel - n. A person who combs his hair over his bald spot, hoping no one will notice.

Yotate (yoh' tayt) - v. To allow a yo-yo to unwind itself.

Zeept (zeept) - n. The accumulation of dead insects around an electric bug fryer.

Zerblot (zur' blaht) - n. The last kid picked in any neighborhood sporting event.

Zipcuffed (zip' cuft) - v. To be trapped in one's trousers by a faulty zipper.