Do you consider it cheating if someone who is married but separated dates other people? When I was a child and my parents separated, both of them dated and it didn't set right with me. They were still married.

Not at all. "Separated" means on hiatus from the relationship, and the rules of it.

Not at all if they are separated then that must mean something is amiss with that relationship.

No, I don't at all. But I think that people should be upfront about it all.

Technically speaking, yes. Because it doesn't take much or that long to get a divorce. I'm assuming you mean if both parties are mutually separated. All too often, only one person is considered 'separated'. Now, my folks were separated 8 yrs before they officially got divorced and yes, they dated other people, but the feelings were mutual and I would never condone waiting that long. I guess it depends on your situation. If you wanna date the exact day the ink is put on your divorce decree, cool....but I don't understand why you would get into relationships with other people knowing that you're still legally married to someone else. And what if you and your spouse decide that you two are going to separate for a little while to give each other space or whatever and then agree to not see other people but one of you winds up doing it anyway? The separation line constantly gets blurred IMO. Don't wanna be together anymore, break up the right way. You can always decide to get back together, you can always get remarried to one another.

If they're both aware of the separation, then no it's not cheating. However, if they have an argument and one of them storms out of the house, moves in their mother for a week, and proceeds to have sex with someone else....then I guess, yeah that's cheating.

I guess technically it isn't, but spirtually I think is IF there are no plans for divorce.

The way I see it is that cheating is about lying. If everything is out in the open, it's not cheating. That goes for polyamorous couples, separated couples, etc.

It may be a generational thing but at one time devout Catholics DID NOT DIVORCE. However, I noticed in a very Catholic community of New Orleans they had a tradition of separating and taking on new lovers while still being married.

This was in the late '60s where I worked at a General Hospital in Marrero Louisiana that I knew several ppl who were living with a lover while still being married. Kinda strange when Phil an older guy had a heart attack and his young "wife" and kids showed up as well as Mrs. Phil his legal wife. They all knew of each other.

My affair with Mrs. "R" at that time was the same. She was still married to an Italian guy but separated. I was young and didn't even realize the risk of sleeping with a Mafioso's ol'lady. But I survived it.

No it's not cheating. Some states force a years separation on people in order to get a divorce. Life is happening now not 12 months into the future. When a couple is separated the rules change.

I wasn't comfortable with my mom and dad dating either and they WERE divorced, I think maybe thats just something kids don't really like?

If they agree to separate then I think dating is okay though.

thepossiblepolice wrote:

I wasn't comfortable with my mom and dad dating either and they WERE divorced, I think maybe thats just something kids don't really like?

If they agree to separate then I think dating is okay though.

I think those are very normal feelings for a child. They have the hope that mom & dad will get back together even when it's completely unrealistic. Or they just aren't able to picture either parent with someone else & are afraid one is being "replaced". Although I have seen it carried into adulthood in a very immature & intrusive way as well.