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 "Love, Honor and OBEY...."

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Supernova
CeCe
Marc™
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Marc™
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PostSubject: "Love, Honor and OBEY...."   "Love, Honor and OBEY...." EmptyMon Oct 25, 2010 9:34 am

The general consensus in the other thread was that "Til Death Do You Part" should stay in the marriage vows....
What's your take on the "....to love, honor and obey" line from yesteryear? Should "obey" still be used in some vows?
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CeCe
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PostSubject: Re: "Love, Honor and OBEY...."   "Love, Honor and OBEY...." EmptyMon Oct 25, 2010 9:47 am

Absolutely. not. It's archaic & has no place in modern society. The idea that a woman is expected to "obey" her husband is a throwback to a time long gone. She's marrying a man not being enslaved to some superior father/master. I think people should just speak their own words. But a marriage is equal or there's very little point.
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Supernova
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PostSubject: Re: "Love, Honor and OBEY...."   "Love, Honor and OBEY...." EmptyMon Oct 25, 2010 11:02 am

In my opinion, nope. I saw a couple getting married on Jerry Springer once and I liked what the bride said, 'I love you but I'll still whoop your ass if you cheat on me'. good one
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Tony Marino
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PostSubject: Re: "Love, Honor and OBEY...."   "Love, Honor and OBEY...." EmptyMon Oct 25, 2010 11:13 am

No, Obey is so victorian and does not fit into today's world at all.
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femme fatale
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PostSubject: Re: "Love, Honor and OBEY...."   "Love, Honor and OBEY...." EmptyMon Oct 25, 2010 1:28 pm

You "obey" your superior. Marriage is supposed to be a partnership of two equals coming together to create a bigger entity they they both manage. Obeying in marriage vows is something from when women had limited legal rights and went from their fathers authority to their husbands.
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RedBedroom
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PostSubject: Re: "Love, Honor and OBEY...."   "Love, Honor and OBEY...." EmptyMon Oct 25, 2010 10:56 pm

Don't both the male and female say the same thing in traditional vows? I think that obey means to obey the rules of family. I don't look at "obey" to mean, if I tell you to do the dishes, you better scoot.
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PostSubject: Re: "Love, Honor and OBEY...."   "Love, Honor and OBEY...." EmptyTue Oct 26, 2010 4:08 pm

The "love honor and obey" comes from a time in our history when marriage included "coverture," which basically meant that when a woman married, she became her husband's property, and he assumed all responsibility for her actions.

Since this is no longer the case, either legally or socially, "obey" is archaic and unnecessary, and most wedding vows do not include the word.
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