Many will applaud a teenager, and even an early twenty-something, for keeping their virginity in tact – as opposed to giving into the temptation to have sex. However, do you think that there comes a certain age where retained virginity becomes less noble and more sad?

Um no, why on earth would it? I think it is much sadder that somebody would have sex just to avoid being an older virgin. How could it be sad?

I guess my question to a virgin over the age of 25 is "What the hell are you waiting for...and if you haven't found it by now, what if you never do?" Gonna leap into middle and old age STILL never having had sex???

Shale wrote:

Yes, sad that someone would miss out on the joys of sharing sexuality with another person. It is one of lifes pleasures and I would feel sad for someone missing out on that.

There are asexual ppl and if they are truly happy with no urges, then that is great for them. However, if it is someone purposely foregoing sexual urges for some fucked up guilt ridden religious doctrine (that has been proven to not be consistently practiced by those preaching it) then it is quite sad.

Proven to be consistently not practiced? That I'd just outright not true. If you wanna have sex, that is your biz, but judging people who chose otherwise, why?

There are many reasons not to do it when society says you should. Attacking people's religious beliefs because they don't sleep around as a result? And people call the abstinence folk judgemental. Apparently they are not alone.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

Proven to be consistently not practiced? That I'd just outright not true. ...

I know you don't read THE MEDIA, but let me torture you with some headlines I have at hand, which no one disputed.

Bishop resigns - admits sexual abuse
Archdiocese (Boston) to pay 86 alleged victims
Minister found naked with teen
Priest accused of decades of abuse

GrayWolf wrote:

I guess my question to a virgin over the age of 25 is "What the hell are you waiting for...and if you haven't found it by now, what if you never do?" Gonna leap into middle and old age STILL never having had sex???

IA. Everyone barring monks and nuns by their middle 20s (whether they're married or not) should have experienced a functional adult relationship. And adult relationships involve sex. I'm all for waiting until you're mature enough to handle it, but at a certain point it becomes procrastination.

I don't know how people like that have the nerve to even show their faces in public!

I guess there is nothing wrong with it but in reality it is a pity to let the younger years go by without experiencing the joys of sex when a person is in their prime of life. To each his own, I would never mock anyone that is a virgin no matter what age.

Sex is one of many joys in life. There's more to life than sex and if somebody's life is fulfilled enough that they don't need sex to make it worth it, I say more power to them. Few people really remain virgins lifelong anyway without entering a religious state. Some just take longer to find somebody they want to share that experience with. I say better to wait and do it with the right person than rush into it and do it with the wrong person.

Besides, I think if you don't NEED sex, when you finally do get to experience it, you'll end up enjoying it more.

Chris wrote:

Many will applaud a teenager, and even an early twenty-something, for keeping their virginity in tact – as opposed to giving into the temptation to have sex. However, do you think that there comes a certain age where retained virginity becomes less noble and more sad?

I don't think retaining virginity at any age is sad at all. If you're a 37 year-old virgin, so what? There's no rule that says you have to do it by a certain age. Why they're waiting is their business and I don't think they should be ridiculed for it or be met with assinine comments like "what are you waiting for?" - comments like that just pressure them and it doesn't help anything.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

I say better to wait and do it with the right person than rush into it and do it with the wrong person.

Very well said FM, I agree.

I don't know if "shameful" is the right word, but it is definitely sad when someone squanders or waste their sexuality. Human sexuality is a natural gift. It's one thing to be selective, but as they say: "If you don't use it, you lose it."

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

...I say better to wait and do it with the right person than rush into it and do it with the wrong person...

This "right person" concept has always been problematic with me. I have had sex with 60 ppl over the years. Did it exclusively with one woman for about 15 years, but I didn't lose my virginity to her.

I lost that to a $3 Mexican whore. At that moment she was the right person for that lesson. The rest has been post-grad work and all of them were right for the moment.

^^^^Well you can only speak for yourself. It's hardly shameful for somebody to have less liberal ideas about who they have sex with.

Tony Marino wrote:

I guess there is nothing wrong with it but in reality it is a pity to let the younger years go by without experiencing the joys of sex when a person is in their prime of life. To each his own, I would never mock anyone that is a virgin no matter what age.

" "

I don't think it is shameful at all. It doesn't have to happen on anyone's timeline but one's own.

Calling it shameful sounds rude but I don't envy a 40 year old virgin at all... AT ALL.

Why should it be? Some people have no desire to hit the mattress with anybody. What about asexual people? You hardly hear anything about them as it is, should they further be treated like sideshow freaks for being what they naturally are? Some people are happy just being by themselves, :biggrin: in more ways than one.