Why Men Can Pee Standing Up

God was just about done creating humans, but he had two parts left over.

He could not decide how to split them between Adam and Eve so he thought he might just as well ask them.

He told them one of the things he had left was a thing that would allow the owner to pee while standing up.

"Its a very handy thing" God told them "and I was wondering if either one of you had a preference for it"

Adam jumped up and down and begged, "Oh Please give that to me! I'd love to be able to do that! It seems like just the sort of thing a man should have. Please! Pleeease!! give it to me!" On and on he went like an excited little boy.

Eve just smiled and told God that if Adam really wanted it so badly, he could have it. So God gave Adam the thing that allowed him to pee standing up.

Adam was so excited he just started whizzing all over the place, first on the side of a rock, then he wrote his name in the sand, and then he tried to see if he could hit a stump ten feet away - laughing with delight all the while.

God and Eve watched him with amusement and then God said to Eve "Well I guess your stuck with the last thing I have left" "Whats it called" asked Eve.

"Brains" said God.

IDK, the joke kind of falls flat seeing as Eve ate the apple first. xD

Forgiveness_Man wrote:IDK, the joke kind of falls flat seeing as Eve ate the apple first. xD

LOL good point FM.

^^^^NEYOWWWW! (High-five if you get it)

Forgiveness_Man wrote:^^^^NEYOWWWW! (High-five if you get it)

Yep I do!

LOL - good joke! Thanks for sharing.

Tony Marino wrote:

Forgiveness_Man wrote:IDK, the joke kind of falls flat seeing as Eve ate the apple first.

LOL good point FM.

At least Eve admitted to God, afterwards that she fucked up--Adam never fessed up, but pointed the finger and blamed Eve saying "The woman gave it to me and said it was ok to eat." Typical guy--blames the wife for all the crap wrong in his life! (I'll bet Adam never asked for directions, either while taking his donkey out for a spin around the ol' Garden of Eden!)

Hyacinth Girl wrote:

Tony Marino wrote:

LOL good point FM.

At least Eve admitted to God, afterwards that she fucked up--Adam never fessed up, but pointed the finger and blamed Eve saying "The woman gave it to me and said it was ok to eat." Typical guy--blames the wife for all the crap wrong in his life! (I'll bet Adam never asked for directions, either while taking his donkey out for a spin around the ol' Garden of Eden!)

What are you talking about? Eve blamed the snake. I'd say typical woman but I ain't a sexist like some. I'll just say that plenty of woman blame some "snake" for tricking them into making a bad mistake. Eve didn't fess up any more than Adam did. Both of them blamed the one who told them to eat the apple. Therefore, my point still stands. The joke falls flat. (And even if I accepted your point, it wouldn't erase the fact that Eve still ate it first and thus, the joke is simply not funny. )

Women don't need to stand up

LOL, good to know.

LOL Alan but I do wonder where it goes. There doesn't seem to be a bowl attached.

Hyacinth Girl wrote:At least Eve admitted to God, afterwards that she fucked up--Adam never fessed up, but pointed the finger and blamed Eve saying "The woman gave it to me and said it was ok to eat." Typical guy--blames the wife for all the crap wrong in his life! (I'll bet Adam never asked for directions, either while taking his donkey out for a spin around the ol' Garden of Eden!)

Excellent point! Also, the snake was male

TSJFan4Ever wrote:LOL Alan but I do wonder where it goes. There doesn't seem to be a bowl attached.

ha HA! i know huh

Forgiveness Man wrote:

Hyacinth Girl wrote:

At least Eve admitted to God, afterwards that she fucked up--Adam never fessed up, but pointed the finger and blamed Eve saying "The woman gave it to me and said it was ok to eat." Typical guy--blames the wife for all the crap wrong in his life! (I'll bet Adam never asked for directions, either while taking his donkey out for a spin around the ol' Garden of Eden!)

What are you talking about? Eve blamed the snake. I'd say typical woman but I ain't a sexist like some. I'll just say that plenty of woman blame some "snake" for tricking them into making a bad mistake. Eve didn't fess up any more than Adam did. Both of them blamed the one who told them to eat the apple. Therefore, my point still stands. The joke falls flat. (And even if I accepted your point, it wouldn't erase the fact that Eve still ate it first and thus, the joke is simply not funny. )

Read closely: In the passage from Genesis, Eve says that the serpent tricked her and she ate, thus fessing up to God. See what Adam says? He says the woman gave it to me and I ate it, thus shifting the blame on her to avoid taking the blame himself. That's what I'm talking about, regardless of the joke or not. It doesn't matter who ate first--they both did, Eve admitted she was fleeced, but Adam did not.


Genesis 3:9-12

9 And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where [art] thou?

10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I [was] naked; and I hid myself.

11 And he said, Who told thee that thou [wast] naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?

12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest [to be] with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.

13 And the LORD God said unto the woman, What [is] this [that] thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.

It is nice to be able to do.

LOL Alan. I a friend sent me that pic in an e-mail and I cracked up!!!!

Was trying to find an email I got with REALLY cool bathroom ideas - all this talk of peeing got me thinking - but I couldn't find them. Anyone get that e-mail? In one, you opened up the door and it looked like you were about to step off into nothing, with the ground several hundred feet below you. Anyway - the first one was kinda the idea of the ones in the e-mail. The second one? I wondered if any guy would actually use a urinal that was that... open, though I guess they were pretty high up, so maybe there's be no one looking in - lol!!!!