"You Know You're Black When…"

• You know what "no home-training" means.
  
• You've told your mother you had a headache and her remedy was to take a crap or some Robitussin.
  
• You were always able to find a Jet, Ebony, Ebony Jr., or Essence somewhere around the house.
  
• Your dad had the uncanny ability to wake up just as you were changing the channel and yell "I was watchin' that!" - no matter how quiet you were...
  
• You fell asleep in your mother's lap while getting your hair cornrowed, woke up, fell back asleep, and woke up again and she still wasn't finished.
  
• Kool aid was the only "sports drink" you knew...
  
• You knew about the controversy of the barbershop/beauty shop dialogue way before "Barbershop" or "Beauty Shop" came out.
  
• Many of the people you grew up calling your aunty, uncle, cousin, sister, or brother have no blood relation to you at all.
  
• You have the tendency to describe people's complexions in terms of food.
  
• Your family had Sunday dinners.
  
• OJ taught you that Black or White doesn't matter. . .So long as you've got green.
  
• You've been told to stop crying before you got something to cry about.
  
• Your parents whooped your behind if you wasted food.
  
• Catfish was a popular meat at your barbeques.
  
• Your parents told you to not even THINK about asking for toys when you go shopping with them.
  
• Back-sassing a parent was the last thing on your mind… if you wanted to live.
  
• You saw your community as part of your extended family.
  
• Your barbers or hairdressers were your friends.
  
• You knew ladies who wore big hats to church that you can't see over when sitting down.
  
• Robitussin was a panacea.
  
• Food with too little spice was simply unbearable.
  
• You got baths in the sink as a baby.
  
• You were told "I'll get mine and forget everyone else" was a terrible mindset.
  
• As an adult, you still look over your shoulder when you know you're doin' wrong...
  
• When your white friends talked to their parents, you ducked...
  
• As an adult, your parents deny ever spanking you...
  
• You feared your friends’ parents as much as you did your own...
  
• You know how to drive a car with no brakes, or lights..Or windshield wipers...
  
• You put hot sauce on everything including macaroni and cheese.
  
• You compulsively barbecue when the warm weather arrives...
  
• When someone makes something good to eat, you say things like "You put yo foot in this"
  
• If you hear your jam you dance despite the location…You could be in the bank, and you would lean and rock with it...(slightly)
  
• You know about forty eight variations of hand shakes...and you can perform the black combination without training..You know the one which starts by locking thumbs, and then a series of other moves...
  
• You can make seventy dishes, including spaghetti with ramen noodles.
  
• You would not be shocked if someone passing in a car shouted out your name without stopping the vehicle...and then you compulsively shout back "Whaddup"
  
• You almost starve to death from December 26 to March due to your families Christmas shopping debt.
  
• Even though the neighbor's kid wound up in prison, your auntie makes sure to remind you of how bad you were as a kid because you painted the dog.
  
• You know what cod liver oil taste like.
  
• “oohh un hun” is an appropriate response to something you don't like.
  
• You know what it meant to be told to go get a "switch." And you bet not bring back a sheisty one.
  
• Sucking your teeth in front of adults ....ummm... bet not happen.
  
• "good hair and bad hair"
  
• When James Evans died you actually grieved
  
• Tremendously loud bass is an acquired musical delicacy.
  
• Your momma told you to put Vaseline on your legs because "it's just like lotion".
  
• Dessert choices were sweet potato pie or pound cake.
  
• You were warned not to drink coffee because it made you black.
  
• Your momma's momma was "Big Mama" and Your dad's momma was "Muh Dea"
  
• You pronounce AUNT like UNTEE, not ANT
  
• You could buy frozen kool-aid pops and Faygo sodas from the back door of an old lady in your neighborhood
  

RobbieFTW wrote:I must be black then because at least 50% of that list I related too. LOL

Chris wrote:I know this list is ignorant (and stereotypical) as hell but I was laughing so hard at it, I had to post it.

[*]You were always able to find a Jet, Ebony, Ebony Jr., or Essence somewhere around the house.
[*]Many of the people you grew up calling your aunty, uncle, cousin, sister, or brother have no blood relation to you at all.
[*]You have the tendency to describe people's complexions in terms of food.
[*]You've been told to stop crying before you got something to cry about.
[*]Your parents whooped your behind if you wasted food.
[*]Back-sassing a parent was the last thing on your mind… if you wanted to live.
[*]You knew ladies who wore big hats to church that you can't see over when sitting down.
[*]When your white friends talked to their parents, you ducked...
[*]You feared your friends’ parents as much as you did your own...
[*]If you hear your jam you dance despite the location…You could be in the bank, and you would lean and rock with it...(slightly)
[*]You know about forty eight variations of hand shakes...and you can perform the black combination without training..You know the one which starts by locking thumbs, and then a series of other moves...
[*]You know what cod liver oil taste like.
[*]“oohh un hun” is an appropriate response to something you don't like.
[*]You know what it meant to be told to go get a "switch." And you bet not bring back a sheisty one.
[*]Sucking your teeth in front of adults ....ummm... bet not happen.
[*]"good hair and bad hair"
[*]Dessert choices were sweet potato pie or pound cake.
[*]You could buy frozen kool-aid pops and Faygo sodas from the back door of an old lady in your neighborhood

TSJFan4Ever wrote:Wow - most of this list is foreign to me, but most of my friends who are black are African, not African American... hmmm... can you be African America but Canadian? I don't think I've heard the term African Canadian.

captainbryce wrote: ... Canada is basically only the 51st state anyways!

Chris wrote:You know you black when it's thundering and lightning outside and your grandma makes you turn off the lights and the TV.

captainbryce wrote:... Canada is basically only the 51st state anyways!

captainbryce wrote:

TSJFan4Ever wrote:Wow - most of this list is foreign to me, but most of my friends who are black are African, not African American... hmmm... can you be African America but Canadian? I don't think I've heard the term African Canadian.

Lol. Nope! You can only be African American if you are from America and black. Black Canadians are simply called "black Canadians", all 8 of them, lol. Although, most of the things on the list probably apply to them too. Canada is basically only the 51st state anyways!

TSJFan4Ever wrote:

captainbryce wrote:... Canada is basically only the 51st state anyways!

I guess that would explain why some Americas sew our maple leaf flag on their backpacks or jackets when travelling in Europe.

Nystyle709 wrote:Not quite. "African" American should really only be used to describe people who emigrated from Africa to America. Of course, it's crazy how it's not realized that Africa has more than one country, but that's another issue. The proper term for 'black' American should be "Afro" American. Black Americans are not considered immigrants.

captainbryce wrote:

Nystyle709 wrote:Not quite. "African" American should really only be used to describe people who emigrated from Africa to America. Of course, it's crazy how it's not realized that Africa has more than one country, but that's another issue. The proper term for 'black' American should be "Afro" American. Black Americans are not considered immigrants.

That's a matter of debate. You are getting into your specific (personal) opinion of what it means to be "African American". I am merely pointing out its common usage among the majority of black people in the US (which is a more general definition). Colloquially, "African American" refers to black people (of African descent) born/raised in the United States. Whether or not the colloquial usage is the "proper" terminology is of course a matter of debate. In principle, I agree with the first part of what you said however but disagree about the "Afro American" bit. Such an expression is pretty much a relic of 1977! One need not be an immigrant to be considered "African American" anymore than one needs to be an immigrant to be considered "Asian American" or "Irish American". Most 4th generation Chinese people living in Manhattan would still identify as "Asian American".

captainbryce wrote:...We do that mostly for safety. And it's usually only "liberal" Americans who are smart enough to do that. Conservative Americans are more likely to have the stars and stripes somewhere on their person and immediately make themselves a target for terrorists. Pride is a beyotch!

I'm in the US military and when we are travelling abroad and "dubious" people start asking us too many questions, we are supposed to claim "Canadian" since most foreigners can't tell the difference between an American or Canadian accent. Nobody really hates Canada but plenty of people hate America.

Nystyle709 wrote:

captainbryce wrote:One need not be an immigrant to be considered "African American" anymore than one needs to be an immigrant to be considered "Asian American" or "Irish American". Most 4th generation Chinese people living in Manhattan would still identify as "Asian American".

Uh, yes they do. They are not indigenous to this country and neither are we. You're thinking of it from a first generation standpoint. The proper terminology for it isn't a matter of debate. Whether or not you choose to identify with it is. I don't think twice about being labeled "African" American. It's not that important to me (because I know most don't know better) but I'm just saying what it is. The proper term should be Black or Afro-American. Your Asian analogy doesn't work because of the simple fact that even though they are 4th generation Americans, their ancestors are still immigrants to this country. So of course they won't (and shouldn't) have a problem identifying with it. An (insert any nationality here)_____ American is someone whose people who came to this country and took up residency and are now American citizens. Black Americans didn't emigrate here. We didn't migrate, sightsee or none of that shit here. We were brought here. Therefore, we are not immigrants. We are not Africans. We are from African descent.

TSJFan4Ever wrote:
Many Canadians bristle at comments regarding Canada becoming the 51st state, as it reveals a total lack of regard for the nation that is Canada and a total lack of respect for who we are. We're a pretty proud bunch, too, and we got a chance to show the world who we were during the 2010 Olympics. There was a real feel of patriotism and unity, especially in British Columbia during that time but also in the time leading up to the Olympics as the torch wound its way around the country, stopping in hundreds of communities all over our nation.

If you use Canada for protection when overseas, why would you want us to become the 51st state? You'd loose that protection.

captainbryce wrote:

Nystyle709 wrote:

Uh, yes they do. They are not indigenous to this country and neither are we. You're thinking of it from a first generation standpoint. The proper terminology for it isn't a matter of debate. Whether or not you choose to identify with it is. I don't think twice about being labeled "African" American. It's not that important to me (because I know most don't know better) but I'm just saying what it is. The proper term should be Black or Afro-American. Your Asian analogy doesn't work because of the simple fact that even though they are 4th generation Americans, their ancestors are still immigrants to this country. So of course they won't (and shouldn't) have a problem identifying with it. An (insert any nationality here)_____ American is someone whose people who came to this country and took up residency and are now American citizens. Black Americans didn't emigrate here. We didn't migrate, sightsee or none of that shit here. We were brought here. Therefore, we are not immigrants. We are not Africans. We are from African descent.

You are of course entitled to your opinion, but you cannot say that your opinion is "what it is" because in my opinion that is NOT the way it is. That my be the way it is merely FOR YOU! It is simply a matter of intepretation. A white person from South African may immigrate to the US and refer to themselves as "African American" (according to your definition). And most other Americans would look at them like they were crazy!


He sure can identify himself as African-American because that's exactly what he is! LOL, that example of yours just shows how much you (and everybody else) totally and ignorantly forgets the fact that Africa is a continent. Not a damn country. It has many countries and Africa is so vast that it shouldn't just be associated with black people. Don't even try and dispute that.

In my opinion, whether your ancestors immigrated here by choice, or were brought here as slaves is irrelevant. The fact is, they did come here from another country and YOU were born in this country. There is no difference in saying "African American" or "Asian American". African Americans ancestors came to America from Africa and Asian Americans came to America from Asia. Whether you choose to identify with that or not is entirely a personal preference. "Afro American" is just an archaic shortening of African American. Your perception of the word notwithstanding, there is no "distinct" meaning there.

[url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/African_American

Nystyle709 wrote:
He sure can identify himself as African-American because that's exactly what he is! LOL, that example of yours just shows how much you (and everybody else) totally and ignorantly forgets the fact that Africa is a continent. Not a damn country. It has many countries and Africa is so vast that it shouldn't just be associated with black people. Don't even try and dispute that.

Nystyle709 wrote:LOL. Ya know, if you planned on using a 'reputable' source to back up your claim, then I'd strongly suggest you stay away from Wikipedia.

Nystyle709 wrote:Hmmm, let's see. Both definitions clearly describes a person who voluntarily leaves their country to come to another, for whatever reason. It is a fact that did not volunteer to come here, it is a fact that we are not indigenous here. Yeah, the fact that we didn't voluntarily come here is extremely relevant. Makes all the difference. Since by that definition, we are not immigrants, then it's a fact that we are not from Africa.