Gay Teen: Stop Bullying or I’ll Sue

http://www.advocate.com/News/Daily_News/2011/01/06/Gay_Teen_Stop_Bullying_or_Ill_Sue//

This is what it takes to get complacent, uncaring officials' attention.

The Southern Poverty Law Center, to which I am a member has used this tactic against hate groups. The KKK in Alabama lost all its property from a lawsuit settlement of one of its victims family - now I guess they meet in the woods like they did in the 19th Century.

Ppl who ignore injustice when they should confront it, usually get moving when faced with costly lawsuits. I suppose this group will have help, from the ACLU or even SPLC in this endeavor.

I hope they do because enough is enough.

If only all bully victims had the case to sue......

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

If only all bully victims had the case to sue......

Which means what exactly? Anyone who's being bullied, threatened, harassed or who is physically assaulted in a public school has the right to sue. Bullying can and often is criminal behavior that goes unpunished and unchecked by school officials.

^^^^Again, if it only worked like that.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^Again, if it only worked like that.

Clearly, it DOES work exactly like that as is made apparent by the content in the article. How do YOU think it works?

^^^^If you're not bullied for certain reasons, suck it up. That's the attitude I've observed in society.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^If you're not bullied for certain reasons, suck it up. That's the attitude I've observed in society.

That is so incorrect. Think about the man who was basically made into a hero for threatening kids on his daughter's bus when she was repeatedly bullied.

RedBedroom wrote:

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^If you're not bullied for certain reasons, suck it up. That's the attitude I've observed in society.

That is so incorrect. Think about the man who was basically made into a hero for threatening kids on his daughter's bus when she was repeatedly bullied.

I don't believe it is incorrect.

Look at all the trouble that man faced despite popular public opinion. I don't mean this in terms of public opinion of bullying.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^If you're not bullied for certain reasons, suck it up. That's the attitude I've observed in society.

That's all good until the bullying becomes so traumatic that kids start taking their own lives by the dozens. Public school should be a place where children are not tortured by other children. And if administration staff are going to ignore these tormentors and turn a blind eye to bullying, that kid who hangs himself or shoots himself or jumps off a bridge because he fears what he'll face the next day in school-- his/her blood is on their hands because they sat by, watched it happend, ignored the cries for help and did nothing! A kid or parent has every right to sue the school administrators for not acting in such cases.

^^^^Oh I agree. I just don't see such an attitude really applied on a wide scale. A kid shouldn't have to kill himself or be a "minority" to have something done about bullying.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^Oh I agree. I just don't see such an attitude really applied on a wide scale. A kid shouldn't have to kill himself or be a "minority" to have something done about bullying.

That's true they don't. But while this article specifically calls out "anti gay bullying" (probably because the "protaganist" is an anti gay activist), the argument against bullying isn't specific to gays. NOBODY should be bullyied. The problem is, gays (or straight people who are preceived to be gay) are more likely to be targeted by bullies because of their sexuality AND gay teens are 4 times more likely to commit suicide due to constantly being tormented at school than straight kids. Stats like that rings alarm bells because they indicate trends.

This is just like the "hate crime bill" argument. On the one hand, all similar crimes should be punished equally because an assault is an assault and a murder is a murder, regardless of whether the victim was black, white or purple. On the other hand, if black families in a rural white neighborhood in the south are singled out for attacks specifically because they are black, that type of crime is obviously much more of a problem for black people. Hate crime labels aren't meant to give "special treatment" to victims of hate crimes based on their race. They are meant as a deterrant to the crime by punishing the "motive" and "intent" of the attackers. If a white kid is walking through a black ghetto with his black girlfriend and 4 black guys beat the crap out of him because he is white, they should be charged with assault and that assault charge should carry more severe penalties due to the fact that it was a hate crime and not just a crime of passion or something like that.

^^^^I really do not believe that statistic. Kids are bullied for a multitude of reasons, many often due to their size.(too large or too small) I feel singling out one reason is just going to ignore the problem. Sure, nobody should be bullied but getting a media to care about non-minority children seems to require them to kill themselves.

I would love to see somebody charged with a hate crime AGAINST white people. lol I don't like the hate crime label at all. I feel it downplays crimes not committed for such a purpose.

And as for this, I don't feel bullying somebody because they are gay is somehow worse than bullying somebody because they are petite or just because they are quiet. Bullying is bullying and instead of trying to stop one kind of bullying, they should be focused on anti-bullying in general. Yet, the only times I see bullying in the news are really when it happens to somebody gay or if the victim kills themselves. I guess the only other time would be if the victim, or somebody on behalf of them, fought back. THEN you see the news pay attention, and often it's the one who fought back that is called to justify their behavior, as if the bullies are the victims.

I really think when it comes to bullying at schools, the law should get involved. If an adult hassles another adult, they can go to the police and a restraining order can be put on them. If the schools aint gonna stop the bullying in the halls, the cops should.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^I really do not believe that statistic. Kids are bullied for a multitude of reasons, many often due to their size.(too large or too small) I feel singling out one reason is just going to ignore the problem. Sure, nobody should be bullied but getting a media to care about non-minority children seems to require them to kill themselves.

There is no logical basis for your argument if the stats are indeed factual and the stats happen to be true whether you "believe" them or not. These numbers are not made up, they have been confirmed by numerous studies.
http://www.livescience.com/culture/gay-lesbian-bullying-100203.html
http://www.lhj.com/relationships/family/raising-kids/gay-teens-bullied-to-suicide/

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

I would love to see somebody charged with a hate crime AGAINST white people. lol I don't like the hate crime label at all.

Forgive me, but that seems like a total contradiction to me. But since you asked for it, here ya go:
http://www.portlandtribune.com/news/story.php?story_id=121355387311981300

Oh, here is another:
http://www.pantagraph.com/news/article_4f232faa-379b-50f9-9cf1-48ce578af072.html

...and another
http://www.wvwnews.net/story.php?id=137

You're welcome. :biggrin:

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

And as for this, I don't feel bullying somebody because they are gay is somehow worse than bullying somebody because they are petite or just because they are quiet.

It's not. But it does happen to be MUCH more frequent making it a more serious problem, especially considering that gay teens are more likely to commit suicide than straight teens. Therin lies the problem!

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

Bullying is bullying and instead of trying to stop one kind of bullying, they should be focused on anti-bullying in general. Yet, the only times I see bullying in the news are really when it happens to somebody gay or if the victim kills themselves.

How exactly are people supposed to be able to do stop bullying in general when there are people who think that bullied kids should just "suck it up" and deal with it? Either you can make the point that ALL bullies need to be dealt with for ALL reasons, or you can say that bullying is not a real problem and we should ignore it! You can't have it both ways. The fact is, people generally don't give a shit about bullying until 4 bullied kids all kill themselves in the same month. When all 4 of them just so happen to be gay, it kind of tells you which types of bullying are more serious. And there was also a girl who killed herself late last year due to cyberbullying. She wasn't gay and it was widely publicized. CNN even did a special regarding bullying and many of the victims reported suicide attempts. Only one out of the 8 panalists were openly gay. The rest were bullied for different reasons. Nobody is saying that ONLY gays should be protected from bullying. They are simply calling attention to the fact that bullying needs to be stopped and special attention needs to be paid to bullying against homosexuals (since it happens much more often). If a black kid was bullied in a white school because he was black, the school would do something about it otherwise it would get sued! That's not the case when it comes to homosexual bullying at all. Gay kids are targeted by bullies more often partically because schools do not have policies on homosexual education or tolorance. They wash their hands of such discussions and gay kids have no avenue of escape.

I saw the statistics and already I see some holes in them. People seem to like attributing things to statistics that they do not actually say. And none of it does anything to really favor trying to stop one particular motive over another.

Why is sarcasm a total contradiction? Nice that you found isolated cases. Still, by and large, I feel those are the anomalies.

I don't believe it is MUCH more frequent at all. Looking at the statistics you presented, I didn't see them stating this either. But even if that were the case, focusing on only that one reason is not going to stop bullies. All they'd do is make up some other reason and then they'd feel justified.

I never said that they need to suck it up. That's what I've observed seeing in cases where a non-gay student is being bullied. And I don't feel it needs special attention. Special attention might make the problem worse by fueling intolerance. As you said, all bullies for all reasons need to be dealt with. Focusing on one problem WILL make it worse. Focusing on the problem as a whole is the only way any of the victims will see relief. Singling out one problem, IMO, just will NOT help those victims.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^If you're not bullied for certain reasons, suck it up. That's the attitude I've observed in society.

That's the most ignorant, uncaring attitude I've heard in a long time.

Good! I'm glad this teen has decided to sue. Being picked on and beat up is the same as harrassment and assault. In my experience, schools are incredibly lazy on punishing bullies and it's pretty clear something needs to be done about it, and if it takes suing them, then so be it. What is so ignorant in our society is that some adults expect children and teens to tolerate being bullied and to "suck it up" as Forgiveness_Man has said, and yet those same adults would never tolerate being harrassed or assaulted in the workplace. Very hypocritical. How can these adults ask children to go through something they themselves would never tolerate?

MandyPerfumeGirl wrote:

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^If you're not bullied for certain reasons, suck it up. That's the attitude I've observed in society.

That's the most ignorant, uncaring attitude I've heard in a long time.

It is uncaring. Hence why I am opposed to it. (And judging by your post, I think you didn't get that. I thought in context, it was painfully obvious that I meant it as a shot at how society views bullying. Guess I overestimated the ability to read things in context. )

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

I saw the statistics and already I see some holes in them. People seem to like attributing things to statistics that they do not actually say. And none of it does anything to really favor trying to stop one particular motive over another.

The statistics say that gay kids are bullied more often than straight kids. They also say that gay kids attempt suicide more often than straight kids. I don't know how that can be intepreted in any other way. Nobody is trying to stop one particular motive. They are trying to stop BULLYING. It takes singling out antigay bullying for people to notice it because the general attitude otherwise is "suck it up".

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

Why is sarcasm a total contradiction? Nice that you found isolated cases. Still, by and large, I feel those are the anomalies.

Because it wasn't sarcasm. Part of your argument is that hate crime labels are unfair because they only target black victims. Even now, you profess that white people being the victims of hate crimes is an anomaly. I've just shown you three cases where it's happened and I bet in those cases you would feel that hate crime label is justified. And even though you delivered that opinion indirectly in the form of sarcasm, it's what you actually believe (otherwise why bring that up at all?)

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

I don't believe it is MUCH more frequent at all. Looking at the statistics you presented, I didn't see them stating this either. But even if that were the case, focusing on only that one reason is not going to stop bullies. All they'd do is make up some other reason and then they'd feel justified.

That's why it's important to stop ALL forms of bullying by dealing with the problem instead of turning a blind eye to it. First things first though. Let's deal with the first motive for bullies to target people (being gay).

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

I never said that they need to suck it up. That's what I've observed seeing in cases where a non-gay student is being bullied. And I don't feel it needs special attention. Special attention might make the problem worse by fueling intolerance. As you said, all bullies for all reasons need to be dealt with. Focusing on one problem WILL make it worse. Focusing on the problem as a whole is the only way any of the victims will see relief. Singling out one problem, IMO, just will NOT help those victims.

You're still not getting it but I don't have time to explain it now. I got a plane to catch. To be continued!!!

Statistics said that gay kids are more likely to be bullied than straight kids. Common sense given that there are more straight kids and thus less of them would be bullied. That doesn't mean being gay is the reason more than any other combined. It just means the other kids don't have a single unifying factor they are bullied for.

Bring it up to illustrate a point. If nobody got the hate crime label, I wouldn't want those three being given it.

But that's not the first motive. It's one motive among many.(I dont see those statistics contradicting this) Targeting one motive is like expecting to stop crime by targeting one weapon.

I get it fine. I just see it from a different angle that changes perspective.

I'm glad that they are taking action. I feel like gay kids (and even adults) are bullied more than other "groups" of kids, and I feel like part of the reason is that so many kids at home (and at church) are taught that being gay is a sin and since God is against gay people, it's more okay to be mean to them.

One of the churches I went to for a short time, when I was 12, passed around a letter with supposed death threats from "The Gays" going on about "Gay Power" and the pastor told us that gay people put gerbils in their butts and other "terrible" things...A 12 year old person hearing that (my first exposure to an adult even mentioning homosexuality) is AFRAID of gay people and I really got the message that they were sick people who were really bad.

Of course I don't think that now, and I don't think all churches are that extreme, but even more progressive churches that I have attended have taken a hard line against homosexuality...As long as a large number of people are taught that homosexuality is bad, I think teens will continue to be bullied for it.

^^^^If every person who was guilty of sin was okay to be bullied, then that's be excuse for everyone to bully somebody else. People blame religion for their bullying but the truth is that most bullies are motivated by the same things regardless of who it is they target.

Forgiveness_Man wrote:

^^^^If every person who was guilty of sin was okay to be bullied, then that's be excuse for everyone to bully somebody else. People blame religion for their bullying but the truth is that most bullies are motivated by the same things regardless of who it is they target.

One would think so...But I think that homosexuality is targeted more so than other "sins". I don't hear anyone making a big deal about the things that they know they are guilty of; pride, lying, lust, jealousy...All are written off as "We're all sinners, that's why we need Jesus." If someone is homosexual though, I don't see a lot of people giving them a free pass.