Playdate Waivers...Good or Bad Idea?

Would you sign a waiver for your child to have a play date at a friend's house? In any happy childhood, playtime bumps, lumps and scraped knees are common place. Accidents happen. But what if you're asked to sign a waiver before your child heads over to little Johnny's house to play?

It's a surprising new trend that is spreading fast across mommy blogs and news outlets and being met with a mixture of concern and disdain.

One specific instance is mentioned at Free Range Kids where a mother writes in for some advice on how to tactfully deal with a four-page-long play date waiver a neighbour insists she sign before allowing other children to enjoy (and potentially injure) themselves on their trampoline.

And according to a recent Miss Manners column in the Washington Post, this isn't an isolated incident of overly cautious parenting.

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"It sounds like an American phenomenon, frankly, and it's a bit alarming," says Nicola Savin, family law lawyer at Birenbaum Steinberg Landau Savin & Colraine LLP.

"At some birthday parties people are asked to sign waivers, if they're at a paintball place, indoor playground or any kind of activity centre…the location itself asks each parent to sign a waiver. That's not unusual. But I've certainly never heard of this occurring in anyone's home."

Savin says that depending on how such a waiver is written, it could be binding and help to protect overly paranoid parents, so long as there is no gross negligence:

"If a child knocks heads with someone on a trampoline and injures themselves, if they had a standard-form waiver for that, that probably would work. But if the trampoline itself was faulty or there wasn't adequate reasonable supervision, it might not protect them."

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Savin does not know of any documented cases of parents being asked to sign waivers prior to play dates in Canada. According to her, parents are far more likely to sue school boards.

"To be honest, I don't think most parents even think about it."

But considering everyone is suing everyone for everything, from too-hot coffee to excessive flatulence, should you be worried?

Before you draft up a play date waiver, Savin suggests you consider the protection you may already have in place.

"Most play dates can proceed without any significant problems being anticipated. I mean, accidents do happen, but that's why you have…occupier's liability or homeowner's insurance, and if a child is injured in any manner on your property, it'll be covered," she says.

I don't think people who do this are being ridiculous. I think they are protecting themselves. Granted insurance covers accidents, but why have to file a claim if it can be avoided with this precaution.

We have a BMX ramp and anybody is allowed on it with a signed note from their parent and a phone call to verify the note is from them.

This is my take on it: FFS


Kids get hurt, it's a part of life, and if I ever would've gotten hurt at a friend's house, my mother would've looked at what I was doing, and not the parents about it.

Well, this about sums up my thoughts on this topic--this is an email I got not long ago, and shows perfectly the absurdity of how much we've let lawsuits, paranoia, and "political correctness" out of fear, rule our lives to the point of no return:


HIGH SCHOOL -- 1961 vs. 2012

Scenario 1:

Jack goes duck hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck's gun rack.

1961 - Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.

2012 - School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.



Scenario 2:

Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.

1961 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.

2012 - Police called and SWAT team arrives -- they arrest both Johnny and Mark. They are both charged with assault and both expelled even though Johnny started it.



Scenario 3:

Jeffrey will not be still in class, he disrupts other students.

1961 - Jeffrey sent to the Principal's office and given a good paddling by the Principal. He then returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2012 - Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. He becomes a zombie. He is then tested for ADD. The family gets extra money (SSI) from the government because Jeffrey has a disability.



Scenario 4:

Billy breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1961 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college and becomes a successful businessman.

2012 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse, Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. The state psychologist is told by Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has an affair with the psychologist.



Scenario 5:

Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

1961 - Mark shares his aspirin with the Principal out on the smoking dock.

2012 - The police are called and Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. His car is then searched for drugs and weapons.



Scenario 6:

Pedro fails high school English.

1961 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.

2012 - Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against the state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English is then banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given his diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.



Scenario 7:

Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the Fourth of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up a red ant bed.

1961 - Ants die.

2012 - ATF, Homeland Security and the FBI are all called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. The FBI investigates his parents - and all siblings are removed from their home and all computers are confiscated. Johnny's dad is placed on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.



Scenario 8:

Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.

1961 – In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2012 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.



This should hit every email inbox to show how stupid and paranoid we have become!

RedBedroom wrote:I don't think people who do this are being ridiculous. I think they are protecting themselves. Granted insurance covers accidents, but why have to file a claim if it can be avoided with this precaution.

We have a BMX ramp and anybody is allowed on it with a signed note from their parent and a phone call to verify the note is from them.

I think it's too bad we've reached this point but people will sue over anything they can now so unfortunately it's not unreasonable. You have a right to protect yourself too. And if you have to file a claim you know what happens to your premium.

Oh lordy. It's time to pack it in folks.

I think these people have nothing to do. Like seriously. I really don't see the point in being a part of a "mommy" blog. Why not let your instincts and your own common sense parent your child? You don't need to follow the advice of someone who doesn't even know your kid. I never heard of a damn "play date" when I was growing up. You wanted to play in the sandbox or go to the park with your friends or just hang out at the house, if your parents allowed it, you just got together. It wasn't a big deal, nobody thought about it that hard and you didn't have to sign a contract to do it.