Kids skipping ahead/being held back grades

Say your child's teacher determined that they were capable of skipping past their next grade level, and could instead go into the one after that. Your child, however, didn't want to go into an unfamiliar classroom where he knew no one and had no friends. Would you allow him to continue on in his correct grade level, or insist that he make the leap?

On the flip side, if you saw that your child was struggling in his current grade level, and teachers recommended that he be held back, but he didn't want to; would you have him repeat the grade or allow him to advance?

I would insist that he make the leap and if he needed to be held back, I would hold him back.

While I'm inclined to agree if they're not getting it they shouldn't be allowed to pass, I have NEVER heard of ANYBODY actually benefiting from being held back, even 80 years ago when my grandmother was held back, it didn't do her any good either and to this day she is STILL resentful about it.

I'm not sure about skipping grades though.

My 11 year old daughter looked like an older teen, very full figured. Apparently the school thought she was older and wanted to skip her to the next grade. Which would have put her in a different school with a whole new crowd of kids. I said no, but had I realized they thought she was older I would have informed them of her age! If they had wanted to skip her from say grade 4 or 5 to the next grade I would have allowed it because it would have meant her staying in the same school with her peer group, but I felt 6th grade to Jr High was too much of a change all at once.

I would keep the kid in his class with his peers and find a way to give extra tutoring for either direction the kids intellect went. One year in childhood often makes a lot of difference in development and being the largest or smallest in class has a lot of impact on social development.