I haven't been interested in meeting any of his little love interests as the first was just a whore gold digger.

So, anyway, the meeting of this new one turned out quite differently than I expected. Prior to her arrival to the house, my high school best friend was there with me for a visit. My friend asked me before she arrived, "Is there anything I can't ask her." I said, "Go for it." So, my friend did grill her a bit. To the point I thought maybe it was going a bit too far. Not so much the questions but the rapid succession of said questions.

Anyway, long story short...it seems this lady is really, really religious. So, my dad is pretending he is too. It bothered me so much that all I ever wanted growing up is my family to come to church with me on Sunday. Now, all the sudden, he's saying grace and not drinking with lunch. In fact, he has her so snowed. She thinks he doesn't drink or smoke cigars at all. That is such a bunch of b.s. and I was so close to saying something about why he had a soda pop for lunch. I'm 36 and I have never seen him drink a soda pop. Let alone not have a beer in his hand at two in the afternoon.

So, at the end of it all, I wanted to tell her something to let her understand she's being duped. She seems really nice.

And I am left with feeling so sad and pissed that he is modifying his drinking for a chick when he can't do it for me or my son. And when I say "me" I mean when he had to pick me up from events and be around my friends back in the day.

I am guessing I won't see her again because I doubt they will last. But if I do, do you think I should tip her off to him drinking?

One thing I know is she really gets on one of my dad's close friends about his drinking. (Jay and my son met her this summer. They started to tell me about it, but I didn't want to know.) Anyway, they said that she lectures Dad's friend and says, "The Devil has a hold of him now, but he will see the light and get alcohol out of his life."

So, Dad must explain the beer in the fridge as being his friend's.

I say yes, let her know what she's really getting herself into, and if she doesn't stay, then it wasn't meant to be.

Thanks Super.

I'm thinking the same. Though I doubt I will see her agian. I guess she will figure it out sooner than later.

Shale, I read you reply the first time and was a tad pissed at the "just stay out of it" part....but then realized you probably speak the best advice.

That said, I am more in tune with someone who knows there is a God, so I still feel for this lady.

I know you don't believe, but really, at the end of the day, even if there isn't a God, believers are not less off, in my opinion.

I really want her to know what she is getting into.

RedBedroom wrote:

Shale, I read you reply the first time and was a tad pissed at the "just stay out of it" part....but then realized you probably speak the best advice.

That said, I am more in tune with someone who knows there is a God, so I still feel for this lady.

I know you don't believe, but really, at the end of the day, even if there isn't a God, believers are not less off, in my opinion.

I really want her to know what she is getting into.

She may be an adult but even adults need somebody to point out when they're being conned. That's why the Bunco squad went into business a long time ago.

I don't think you need to say anything, sooner or later she will twig to what he is. If you just play along you don't alienate your father, and she will figure it out on her own. So I advise being quiet.

Suzi wrote:

I don't think you need to say anything, sooner or later she will twig to what he is. If you just play along you don't alienate your father, and she will figure it out on her own. So I advise being quiet.

Suzi, I totally respect and appreciate your advice. I will do my best to take it.

Not sure I will if I see her as I doubt I will go for a visit before Christmas. And so, if she is there at Christmas, and he has his first sober Christmas in at least 36 years, all bets are off. I won't hold back. Which leads me to think we will finally do Christmas here at my home with us and my stepdaughter.

im gonna PM you.

Bunny, sorry if I was flip in the message. I totally hear you...

My advice Red would be not to say anything but don't lie for him.

Quote :

BTW, if your dad is an alcoholic maybe this is a turning point for him.

I have always said some people need religion to make them behave like decent human beings. Excellent point Shale.

Shale wrote:

From what you describe, it looks like a match made in heaven. He's a lying cad and she's a pushy religious freak. They deserve each other and I would just stay out of it, let the lie fall apart when it eventually does.

If he is going to dig his own grave let him.

Alan Smithee wrote:

My advice Red would be not to say anything but don't lie for him.

No. Stay out of other people's relationships. She'll find out on her own and make her decision accordingly. On the flipside, if your father is an alcoholic, maybe her being a religious fanatic might rub off on him and curb his drinking.

Thank you all for the good advice.

Should she have staying power, I will stay mum. I won't hide my drink from her should she encounter me at a campfire next summer. So, I guess I am feeling torn still. But I do feel a bit embarrassed by the attitude I had Sunday. So to each their own...should she marry him, it will just give me an easy out to move to Illinois sooner than later if my son decides not to go to college in our state.

"I won't hide my drink from her should she encounter me at a campfire next summer."

Oh HELL no!