I have. And it was odd. They continued a very close relationship for their son's sport. Yet, he dated, treated her like shit and wanted to keep up a family persona, while being a total cad.

It was difficult for those of us who attended parties with them after they divorced. She has finally found a good guy and I hope it lasts.

None of my friends are married.

Cheaps wrote:

None of my friends are married.

I been kinda let down when friends break up with somebody they were seeing that I liked tho.

There was a couple we were close with. Their son and our daughter were like brother and sister. Sucked when they split up. We knew them because my wife used to work with the husband. He turned into kind of a jerk because my wife took his ex's side on a couple of things. We're still in touch with her. He moved to Florida. They are still an odd couple though because his ex lets him and his girlfriend stay at her house when they come north. Better than hating each other, I guess.

Yeah, it is better than hating each other. It's nice for the kids when things remain smooth. When I first began dating Jay, I was pretty surprised how well he and his ex wife got along still. Now after all these years and a few other things happening, I see it all much differently.

Just because a couple can't stay married doesn't mean they can't still love each other on some levels. My wife and I walked hand-in-hand to the courthouse to get our divorce and I visited her a few times out of town after that, spending the night in her bed.

Same with me and Jim when we separated after 5 years. We were still friends and I attended his wedding to a mutual friend with whom we shared a flat in Pittsburgh.

Shale, I have always admired the way you speak of Brenda and of course of your step-daughter and grandsons. It is a rarity in divorce that things remain so healthy and happy.

I remain diplomatic about my step-daughters mom. She has never done me wrong, and in fact, did me really right in many situations. But I now see she was all about being besties with Jay post-divorce so long as he jumped when she said, "jump." So, as far as them remaining close for the sake of their daughter, it was one-sided. She wasn't as nice to Jay once he was in a serious relationship with me. She went through a total adjustment phase including a money thing.

That said, she was always excellent to me. In fact, for a long time, I got visitation when Jay was in his "ass hat" period and not even living with me and our son. She did not have to still let me have visitation, yet did. And when I had an injury and couldn't drive for a long time, she drove her to and from my home. And it wasn't as if I was a free babysitter, as my step-daughter was old enough to stay home alone at that point. It meant so much to me.

The whole thing is odd, but if she had not been so giving, I would not have such an amazing step-daughter in my life as super close as we are. I would never in a million years been as mature as my step-daughter's mom turned out to be.

The only thing upsetting is if you are friends with both parties and they divorce, then who are you more loyal to?

No.