Do you think that an extreme drinking problem automatically deduct points from being a good parent? The kids are fed, clothed and cared for, but at the same time they are also witness to their parents regular drunken stupors.

Oh yes. No matter how much the kids are provided for, an alcoholic parent is such a negative on a kid's life.

I couldn't say because in my family the only drunken stupors there are, or rather WERE, were violent ones when my mom was a kid, her parents would get drunk and, of course drunk OR sober, they'd hit her and smack her around and you name it, over any little thing, or even over nothing.

I am so very sorry for the violence in your family that was alcohol related.

However, sometimes it just really really sucks for the kids of alcoholic parents even if they are not abusive. I suspect some would rather the negative effects happen behind closed doors and not the public escapades that some are prone to.

RedBedroom wrote:

Oh yes. No matter how much the kids are provided for, an alcoholic parent is such a negative on a kid's life.

RedBedroom wrote:

Oh yes. No matter how much the kids are provided for, an alcoholic parent is such a negative on a kid's life.

I haven't come across any drunks that were pleasant. I used to drink str8 booze when getting to a party late so that I could tolerate my drunk friends.

Just the fact that it sets a bad example is enuff to call a drunk parent a bad one imo.

Parenting is THE most selfless job in the world. The AA big book talks about how alcoholics are selfish, self-absorbed, and only care about the drink. That does not sound like a "selfless parent" to me.

Even if the alkie is "functioning", the kids get too embarrassed to bring friends around, feel they have to make up excuses, and try to take care of the drunk...... Let the KIDS be kids, and the PARENTS be the parents.

Drunks----stop drinking for the sake of your kids. It amazes me that people freak out about smoking the way they do, but drinking is acceptable. The stores that opened first during the hurricane were the liquor stores--no lie.

Nope bad influence on the kid.

It's a bad influence. Kids should be spared the fact that their parent/parents is/are a lush/lushes.

Probably. One of the reasons I shouldn't ever have kids. Alot of my gluttony would sets a bad example, but I got no desire to wanna give it up.

I would have to say yes. Even if the parent is actively involved in their child's life, if there is a problem with alcohol abuse then there are going to be times when that parent is not as dependable as they think they are, or as they should be.

Sidenote, I had a friend (very close at the time) who went to jail for 1.5 years because of too many DUI's. When he got out of jail he picked up right where he left off, possibly getting worse. The best thing was that he couldn't legally drive and he was too big physically and too well-known to slip by cops. I watched how alcohol impaired his memory and also his judgement. He would say things one day and the next "forget" that he said them. What was sad is that a lot of times he made sense...he just couldn't f*cking remember making sense! He was a nice guy overall, but alcohol was the #1 thing on his mind. he complained a lot about people not being there for him, and even I started to see him as an ass (and eventually ended the friendship) because he would do disrespectful things while drunk and in the morning all he would acknowledge was "last night was wild!"

Anywho, I say all of this because out of all the years I knew him, I would completely forget sometimes that he had a son. He showed me a few pictures, but he didn't have any up in his room, I never saw any child-like things laying around...I didn't even know his name because he never talked about him, and most parents will at least mention their kids once. And of course, going to jail over something as stupid as drunk driving didn't win him any parenting awards.

Without question, alcoholism is a drug. No matter how well loved, or how well cared for, the kids are a parent who is forever sucking on their own bottle is setting a horrible example.