Your Opinion of Premarital Sex

Do you deem it sinful or wrong to have sex outside of marriage? Don't be ashamed to be a hypocrite. Say so even if you do and even if you've done it.

Personally I don't, but hey that's just me...

If it is then I'm going to hell because I've never been married, and am as far away from a virgin as you can get.

I'm not much on morals and all that stuff but I'm not for it. The way I see it is when you get married, you promise to love and honor for better or worse, richer or poorer, blah blah blah...and at the same time there's all these people saying if their spouse was lousy in bed, they wouldn't marry them...so love is only secondary in marriage to hitting the sheets? And then there are the people that say there's nothing worse than 2 virgins doing it that don't have any idea what they're doing...funny, I thought the fun was in learning together how to get something right. Contrary to popular belief, it ain't going to be the end of the world if the first time doesn't leave both of them seeing skyrockets or something.

Now, where I personally stand on it, I'd never do it, because even with protection, when two fertile people engage in sex, there is risk of pregnancy, and if I'm not married, there's no way in hell I'm getting pregnant or evening opening the lid on that Pandora's jar in the first place.

Most of the time it's tacky, but I wouldn't go so far to say it's "wrong". I notice that the people who have it ingrained in their heads that premarital sex is wrong are the one's who wind up rushing into marriage at 18, 19, 20 years old. What's fueling the engagement, love or a hard-on?

There are always additional options with people like that. A lot of them get married to get away from something.

Morally opposed to it, but ain't going to legally ban it.

Personally, I think people can wait and have never really gotten the excuses of why they can't. I am sure some will come with a bunch of them but all it really comes down to is impatience. And frankly, looking at our society, I am not really seeing positive fruits coming from pre-martial sex.

Especially if it results from a short running relationship that hasn't even had time to seriously be determined a serious one yet.

^^^^Which is often(not saying always) the case.

Nope. Sex enhances a relationship. I'm not, nor have I ever been, the one for casual sex and just sleeping with people all willy nilly....but do I think it's wrong to have sex with your boyfriend/girlfriend? Not at all.

Indeeeed, but you can be sure the majority of the morons who go for those purity ring things do the deed long before they ever get married assuming the same ones even do.

Nothing wrong with sex in a relationship. Or sex, period. So long as you're not hurting anyone, then hey...do what you enjoy.

Kral wrote:Touche! I'm sorry but when it's announced that some 19 yr old Jonas brother is marrying his GF (after they make such a big deal about being a virgin) we already know what that's about.

People act like because B is wrong that A must be the right option. xD

IMO, relationships need to be about more than sex. Our culture loves casual sex, hence lasting relationships are next to impossible to find. You don't get married just to get laid, and I don't think getting laid before marriage helps it either. People base marriages on the wrong things and then they don't have what it takes to keep them together when the poopoo hits the fan.

Everybody agrees...well everybody with a brain anyway, that if you count on sex to help your relationship, to make it stronger, to make it better, whatever...you're just setting yourself up for one big fall because it only complicates things when it's used as a substitute for any real substance in a relationship.

^^^^Exactly, which are the natural reasons I'm opposed to pre-marital sex, at least some of them.

I dont see how or why premarital sex could be considered wrong if both people consent to it. Who does it hurt? Personally (going by the "til death do us part" mentality) I think it's sad to have only one lover your whole life.

Why's that?

@Robbie: I'd argue it harms the couple doing it, albeit in a non-physical way. But I don't necessarily judge things by how much they hurt people. Frankly I think that's a dumb excuse to put pleasure over right and wrong. But yeah, aside from morals, I think it definitely hurts the couple in non-physical ways.

What's wrong with only one lover in your life? Better one good lover than a bunch of forgetful ones. I'd even argue we're physically designed for one person. IMO, multiple lovers is trying to fill a void of something else lacking. I think it's sad that there would even be a need for multiple lovers in one's life. If one is not content with that one special person, I can't help but be sorry for them cause I really think they're setting themselves up for an empty existence.

Can you imagine only eating one person's cooking your whole life? It's great when someone finds that one who they're willing to commit to for the long haul and get married, and I don't champion promiscuity (banging any and anything that moves) but there's nothing wrong with two unmarried people who're dating to have a sexual component to their relationship.

The idea of waiting for marriage to have sex is antiquated and basically stupid to me. You spend all that time being sexually inexperienced, then when you finally find a spouse you're as sexually green as a grass. What if the two of you turn out to be sexually incompatible? They like this, you don't like that...you like this, they don't like that. That's gonna be a fun (and quick) marriage.

That's if you get married. What if you never do? Do you then grow old never having sex and then dying a virgin? How depressing.

JM130ELM wrote:Can you imagine only eating one person's cooking your whole life?

That's if you get married. What if you never do? Do you then grow old never having sex and then dying a virgin? How depressing.

I think history and common sense has shown that sex and food are on entirely different levels on both a physical and emotional level. It's ridiculous to try to compare the two and it cheapens sex to try and say otherwise. (Heck, just to use the easiest examples, a wife doesn't divorce her husband because he eats somebody else's cooking but she might very well divorce him for banging another chick) To try and seriously compare a sexual partner to somebody who's cooking you eat, good grief, the comparison fails on so many levels.

It's hardly antiqued or stupid. Morals of it aside, it just works better. Sex is an expression of love, and a relationship built on sex is doomed to fail. If you and your partner have the proper views of sex, I don't think you'll get caught up in "incompatibility." Besides, the divorce rate is sky-high and people are still having sex before marriage. So CLEARLY, premarital sex doesn't prevent divorce. I've heard that same "compatibility" excuse given so many times and it really is a dumb reason if you think about it.

Dying a virgin is depressing? Gosh, I would think there are worse things in life. People have their priorities screwed up. So if you're dying alone, having had sex out the wazoo would make it somehow less painful?

Besides, it's certainly not like we got the epidemics of sexually transmitted diseases and infections that there are in the world from everybody just staying with one person. And how about the possibility of being responsible for incest? You have sex with somebody, they don't mean much, you move onto somebody else, maybe settle down with them, have a kid, but the last person you had sex with had a kid too, and suppose when those kids are older they fall for each other? Then that's incest, and if they have a kid, that's inbreeding which puts their kid at a whole bunch of risks for health problems.

^^^^But we only remember that when justifying something else. When showing the consequences of a promiscuous life, that just doesn't happen. lol

People are too sex hungry these days.

Indeed, you'd think they'd literally die if they didn't have an orgasm.

^^^^Well, that's what people live for these days. IDK what corrupts more, the search for money/power, or the search for that.